Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Past the Point of No Return

Well, I did live through Friday. Thankfully. Although, it was extremely loud. I knew that going into it; but it was well worth it. I'd go again. And again, and again.

Naturally, no cameras were allowed, and even if they were, my battery had up and died just before we left the house. I wanted to get pictures of everyone dressed up for the night. Hey, it usually only happens on Sundays for church; so for us ALL to be dressed up on a Friday night was something, well, very nice.

We headed out to dinner before the show, all dressed up, looking good and trying desperately to stay that way. Surprisingly, we did.

Red Lobster; sea food for all but Cinderisa who ordered chicken fingers. Go figure, the 15 year old orders chicken. Nicholas orders crab legs, as did Christina. Not Marisa, but the 6 year old did. I was truly second-guessing this, but he ate them.

My sweet little 6 year old; ah yessh. This little guy has been waiting for the Phantom. Everyday, for the past few weeks, he has been asking "When are we going to see the Phantom?" Every. day. It has been going on since we bought our tickets in May that we told him we were going to see the Opera.

You wouldn't think a child of his age would be so interested in a performance such as this, now would you? Well, he is. He received the movie for Christmas from us/Santa, and he has loved it since. He knows the songs and the story quite well. I knew he would enjoy the show.

I just didn't realize I would be "SHUSSSSSH"ed through it by him. Oh yeah, his little pointer finger on his lip and all.

"Nick, can you see, OK?" Because he was upset that a man sat in front of him.

"SSSHHHHHH!!!!!!"

"Are you enjoying the show?" Me with big intriguing smile, you know genuinly wanting to knwo.

"SSHHHHHHH!!!"

(Frank) "Buddy, wanna sit on my lap?"

"SSHHHHHH!!"

"Do you like it, Buddy?"

"SSHHHHH!"

"Buddy, watch the..."

"SSHHHHH, Frank, I'm trying to watch!!"

Ok, so he was just enjoying the show, already. He didn't miss a trick either. We didn't need to point out ANYTHING. He saw them on the catwalk. He knew the gendarme was in front of us; we were only 3 rows back from the stage. A little too close for comfort maybe. But great for the costume detail. And awesome for the kids.

Marisa, of course, during the intermission, had to check out the pitt. She was awed by it. Loved it, can't wait to go to college. YEAH!!!!!

Unfortunately for Christina, this night proved to be somewhat yucky for her. She left the house feeling under the weather. Her dinner, she didn't want to eat, and she wasn't in the mood for the show; both of which she had to endure the company of anyway. Dreadful for her, but in the longrun, she enjoyed.

As for the volume of the performance, I have a strange feeling that Nicholas will, unfortunately, follow my demise of migraine. The poor kid was forever covering his ears. Just a strange feeling, and some other things he's said to me. I know Marisa will, as she already has headaches with her periods. How can they not?

On Saturday, we ended up just lounging around, wasted, and watched "Flushed Away" which was cute. I felt flushed away. Took a nap, and now seriously don't remember the rest of the day.

Tomorrow, I start round 2 of infusion for another 3 days. please, oh please oh please work this time!!

Yesterday, my house was cleaned. Not by me, or my kids, or by Frank. Well, he paid for it. He had it cleanedFOR me; isn't he great! Let's face it, I'm spoiled - rotten. I haven't been able to keep my house the way I used to, SO, he has decided that it's time to just GET someone to do it for me.

At first, I'll admit, I was very reluctant, because, it's not an easy thing to give up anything. It's been hard for me to give up the ability to go back to work, which I was only able to maintain just a few short years ago. Well, that's not even a remote possibility.


I've been a stay-at-home Mom for a long time, so working was new to me, and I enjoyed it. Again. Then, I got nailed harder than ever before with the migraines. I mean, I always had them, and was able to just manage them, or so I thought. Not so much anymore.

Now, not only can I NOT work outside of my home, but I'm finding it hard to keep the work IN my home up. Now that in itself is a much harder struggle for me. That is the stuff I never had a problem managing. I could deal with the work thing; but not this. Because there is just too much at stake here in my home. This involves my family.

My love of cooking, and gardening are things that are taking a toll on me lately. Things that I used to enjoy, drain me of energy. They cause me such pain and such heartache, that sometimes I wonder if they are really worth the effort it takes to make them worth the effort at all. But then I see the wonder they produce; or I smell them baking or roasting, or my children know the name of their flower or herb when I ask them to retrieve it from the garden. It is then that I know, yes, it is so worth my energy, my pain, and oh yes, it worth the time it takes to struggle through to make the effort worth it all.

I am reminded that I have Parsley and Oregano, Rosemary and Thyme in my garden that needs harvesing. I have Mums that need planting. I have little gourds I am watching with Nicholas and the girls, as they get bigger each day. Our white pumpkins, 4 in all, are now in the lawn for decoration. I now know where we'll put our pumpkin patch for next year. Our white pumpkin patch. I may not be able to garden like I did 10 years ago, but my children have a passion for gardening; and they didn't just wake up with it. It was instilled in them, from my passion. So they will grow it with me. As they always have.

Wishing you all painfree days.
Deborah

6 comments:

Jeff said...

That's so cool. Now I want to see this opera. Glad you guys had fun!

Emily said...

so glad you guys enjoyed the phantom! it is really a lovely time.

a housecleaner? wowsers, you are one lucky lady. :) you obviously know that. nice to have a little break from the guilt of the dirty house. i could do with a dose of that myself. ;)

and as to hobbies.....i wish i didn't know exactly what you mean. i'll get these ideas, projects or baking, or music....and then remember why i haven't done that in a while. because it would be the only thing i could do that day! and the dishes need washing, and the food needs cooking, the laundry needs washing, etc.etc.etc.

sometimes i think the thing that keep me going is beauty. roses, music, laughter....and having some friends who understand really help. :)

Migraineur said...

Deborah, I hope this doesn't sound strange or insensitive, but it sounds to me like you are leading a wonderful life. I'm in awe of the way you wring every single drop of happiness out of the cards you've been dealt. If you'll pardon the mixed metaphor.

As for me, I've been pain free for 4 months (though for a few minutes this morning I thought I felt an aura coming on), and I still want to hire a housecleaner. Why mess with such trifles as brooms and mops when there's a world out there to be enjoyed?

deborah said...

Jeff: When it comes to your town, for Heaven's sake, get the tickets for the whole family. You won't regret it.

Em: You're right on the beauty thing; it far outweighs the dirty dishes piling up, doesn't it.

Mig: Enjoying life is much better than doing anything else. I now quote my Grandma, which I never could understand at the time she was saying to me in my haste; "The housework will be there tomorrow." Funny, how smart she was! I sure do miss her and Gramp.

Dr.Carley Clan said...

Deb-
Yes your grandma was a smart lady, the housework will be there the next day!

I am so happy that you were at least able to enjoy an outing with your family! You sound like a great mom. I love the garden, I love growning roses, for me it is peaceful! I would like to branch out and grow the things you grow, it is great you were able to teach you children that.

About the housework: my husband and I hired a housekeeper. Everyweek she comes to clean. When you think about it with all the pain we have to endure that is a very small expense for ourselves to save our energy for our family, or perhaps private time with our husbands. We need to be able to conserve our energe in as many places as we can so we can have a full life (as much as we can)with our family and friends. Housework (I think you would agree with me) is not on the top of my list of high importance when we can hire someone to help us with it.

I say cheers to you and your wonderful hubby for the great idea.It sounds to me you have a wonderful husband like I do.

we shall talk soon on the phone!!
I will be praying the infusion works!
Cheers to a Pain free day!!
Lisa
www.migraincommunity.blogspot.com

deborah said...

Thanks, Lisa. You're right. Although hesitant each time they come, I'm giving it a chance and trying to give it over to them. This was the first time I actually allowed them to just go do it all. I usually tell them, "oh, you don't need to do this, or that." Then Frank will ask me why I did. Crazy, I know. It's just part of the giving up stage, I suppose.

I'll be home today.