Tuesday, January 30, 2007

What Was I Thinking

Really. What on earth was I thinking when I was complaining about the fact that there was no snow falling on my Christmas?

Did I fail to remember how the bitter and bone-chiling, booger-freezing, not-wanting-to-go-out-and-move-the-van-into-the-garage-to-warm-it-up-before-I-have-to-go-somewhere cold, is SO cold that not even the kitties are going outside?

The dog has such a hard time with the single digits, that it's actually kind of comical. He balances himself from three legs, holding one up out of the frigid snow - as to keep his paw from touching. Then to shift weight again to another round of legs, lifting a different paw up off arctic snowcaps, balancing, or trying to balance his bulk of natural muscle on three legs.

Why WHy WHY?????? Did I complain? It really wasn't so bad having "unseasonably" warm temperatures. In the mid 50's. In December. What would I give for a 50 degree day now? Better yet, what are we giving up for the reverse? When I woke up this morning, I believe it was 11 degrees outside. 11.

Driving Marisa back to school yesterday, there was actually, and I still can't even believe it as I write this!! But there he was, running in a storm, it was coming down pretty good, the temp was 15. I looked. It was snowing at a rate of 2 inches per hour. The wind chill was somewhere near -10. Yeah, degrees. I know. This guy had, literally now, white frozen solid, eyebrows and mustache on his face. Well, we just cracked up at the site of him, asking if each other saw him, then realizing, in hysterics, that we did. I mean, what was he thinking?? Is it THAT important to get a run in? In these conditions? His face, as my Mother used to put it to me when I was a kid, "froze that way!" In the literal sense. How good can it possibly be for your body, in any form to be exposed to such conditions?

What a freak!

I kept Nicholas home yesterday because of the weather. I didn't even want to bring Marisa back; but because of labs, she was insistent! I've never been one to send my litter out into the elements if it's dangerous. Yesterday was, without question, dangerous. We saw two car accidents on the way to school, from the dentists office, withing a mile of each other. the traffic on our street alone, was backed up from accidents both lastnight AND again this morning; both on opposite corners, nontheless. Dangerous. Bus rollover on the news this morning.

Again I ask myself, what was I thinking???? Clearly, I wasn't. I just really wanted to see the pretty, in-a-paper-weight-sort-of-snowfall-look. Not live the Alberta Clipper everyday. I hate the cold. It hurts.

This morning I saw my pain doc. He shoved a needle up the back of my head. AAHhhhhhh, I'm sure, in a few hours, I will feel relief; however, for now, not so much. Next month I'm scheduled for the freeze. This is supposed to last for three months. Hey, one can hope, right. Because quite frankly, the needle thing, that really sucked. Out loud. But it did help for a few weeks last time around. For now, it's a little friend of mine called, Zofran - ah yes - my buddy to help me with this little itty bitty knot, no not a knot so much as a ........ hmmm what do I want to call it?? Stabbing nausea today coming with the ice pick kind of. So, we are going to go lay down together. And stay warm.

I hope everyone else is feeling well today

Friday, January 26, 2007

Why Cant.......

Why can't I wake up in the morning, like TV people do, and look fresh and wonderful? Perky and made up? (Oh, the perky part, I was talking about boobs!) Insert an old saying, "Here today, gone tomorrow," don't know why it just suddenly popped in my head without warning, just did . Maybe it's because as I look down, I see..... my lap. No boobs. Nothing. reality sucks there girls. I want to see my favorite soap star, you know the pretty perky bitch one in like, 15 YEARS AFTER 4 KIDS WHO SUCK HER DRY!!!! Why can't they just ONCE have them 'wake up' with their mascara smudged and messy hair and pale-faced? In pajamas that don't necessarily match? Or in sweat pants. Old. Ugly, worn-out and torn with paint stains and puke marks on them or something. SOMETHING REAL! next...

Why can't they advertise with an actual slob person on work-out equipment that looks like they need it? Like me for instance? I actually look like I need it. Someone who hasn't been spending quality time IN a gym or a tanning salon; but pasty white, kinda dry from the winterness (someone wiki that for me). Someone who perhaps, hasn't had the $$ to shell out to a personal trainer beat them over the head with harsh insults to diligently work with. You know the type, you're sitting here reading this; just look at yourself. You disgust me! Oh, sorry, I was talking to myself again. So really, what gives with that?? Why the toned, and tanned, oiled up super bodies? Makes me want to eat, no STARVE myself!!!!! BLAHHHHHHH.

Why can't we get rid of these ridiculous "reality" (yeah, OK) shows like Maury and the like. Get this crap off the air, put something decent on for a change, something that makes me want to grab a kleenex, not a sledgehammer. (Note: I do NOT watch said shows.) I remember the good old shows like, here we go: The Waltons, or Family, remember I Love Lucy? Oh whatever.


Why can't stupid beauty products do what they say they do? If I buy shampoo that says it's going to straighten my tight curly hair, shouldn't it? Or, if I buy gel, that claims to 'dazzle them,' shouldn't someone be freaking dazzled?? I'm certainly not! I'm noticing lately, I have too many shampoos, conditioners and products that claim to do, but do NOT what their supposed to. What's a queen to do? I don't have the time energy oh crap I just plain don't want to spend anymore time than I need to in front of the mirror. I don't want to spend time working out either. Boo hoo.


Bippity Blogity Boo. I want my Fairy stinking Godmother to pop into my life damn it! And grant me my wish! When do I get MY WISH??


Why Can't makeup STAY ON ALL DAMN DAY!!!!!!!!! I know this falls under the"whole product that claim to do" thing, but really; make up! For what it costs, and it does say, and I quote "everfreakinglasting" ok, not the freaking part, but you know what I mean, it doesn't last. At all. Not even for a little long. And dare I apply a little darker, I get that Tammy Faye look about me. Not such a good look. I'm of the darker shade of pale white paper, white. Ivory, is dark for me as far as concealer goes. And for the wackiest reason, must be the Indian in the bloodline somewhere, when I do venture into the sun, I do get a rather bronzing effect. But because I hate the heat, and the sun, I'm a shader.


Anyway, the makeup thing - I'm suggesting something a bit more lasting in the "long-lasting" arena. I just can't keep buying the stuff. I walked thru the makeup aisle again today, and was just amused by the prices. and again, didn't buy a thing. Still need to. Didn't. I'm eager to try the new mineral stuff out there, but haven't. Wondering, does it stay on? all day? really??


While we're on the makeup thing, in the ads,why can't they stop airbrushing? We all know they do it. Why not just show us what the make up really looks like when it's applied!


Why can't the price of gas go down as fast as it went up? nuff said


Why can't women appear as distinguished as men do with lines. Why do the so-called beauty experts need to remind us that our little lines need to be relinquinshed. As a matter of fact, I believe I've earned mine. All two. (ahem)


Why can't Sally Field be real in her stupid commercial about how her "friend" who has to "set aside time ONE DAY EACH WEEK JUST TO TAKE A FREAKING PILL FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!" ok, ok, end quotes. Know what, Sally, you should see MY pill case! For Migraine DISEASE!!!!!!!! I have to set aside time, everyday, four times a day, just to take these pills. Not to mention the day I need to set aside to set up this awful preparation kit. You wouldn't believe how confusing it is to make sure I get them right; what with 5 different meds and 2 herbals, and a multi-vitamin. It's confusing. It takes me about 20 minutes. Ok, two times a day here; and three times a day there; here a lunch, there a bed, this one is just morning......


Bite me, Sally! I also have my 'to-go' container I need to make sure is full. just in case I'm not home when I need them. Make sure my abortives are in there in the event of Migraine attack while I'm out. Let's not forget the never-ending confusion that goes along with the Migraine Disease! And the short-term memory loss. This can make refilling our pill containers, interesting? Let's not forget the never-ending confusion that goes along with the Migraine Disease! And the short-term mem. wait, did I already say that? Never mind. Bite me Sally, just BITE ME!!!! One day a week, Puleeeeeeeeease!


Why can't the stations on the tv get their volume problems in synch? It's not enough that I'm tightly wound, (shocker, right) but when I change the stations, do I need to get screamed at? Literally screamed at, and it's usually none other than Billy Mayes! Or Tony Little, running his rather large carcass too fast and furious on some stupid piece of machinery I'm never going to buy.


I sit and watch a program on one station, too low, turn up the volume. Commercial comes on, and by the way, there are way too many commercials on. way too many commercials on tv. Not enough of my show time, but plenty of commercial time. So I change to one of my fav channels, just to be blown off the couch because there he is, legs going too fast, mouth screaming at ME, eyes wide like he's been back stage shooting steroids. Idiot. Now, my heart is racing, so basically I don't need his stupid equipment, I just got a great workout. I've never gotten off the couch so quick in all my life!


But wait, I turn the station again, and there is none other than Billy boy, wanting to change my life with some cleaning product I just CANT' LIVE WITHOUT!!! This has been my cardiac workout. Now for a little stress release; hmmm, what to do?? Where is that DOG?


So why can't I look like the Victoria Secret model I bought my bikini from? I was promised a certain lift to another dimension. Did I get it? Oh yeah, I got a lift alright, in finance and shipping charges. But as far as the push-up, whatever. I guess I'll use the duct tape like she uses. They forget to mention that little part in their clever ad. Can you just see it; "this model has not been genetically or surgically altered, but has been set gently together by adhesive measures. Do not try this at home without Professional Adhesionist."


While we're on it; Why can't they feed the animals models? Should we have to look at bones with skin draped like lace, so delicately put together? Do our children need to compare themselves to this much longer? You know, someone needs to tell these starving girls, they are going to have to set aside time one day, each week, to take A FREAKING PILL when they get older if they don't eat. Can you say, osteoporosis?

Why can't we have an honest salary in America? Hitting some chords now. Like for instance Major League baseball is getting out of hand! Give me a small break please. No really, like a 5th of a breakdown of a benchwarmers pay from the Yanks. Or the Red Sux, I'd be living LaVita Loca baby. Ridiculous.

Why can't I be considered CEO, with pay and benefits! I'm ready to retire!!!!

"Why can't we all just get along?"





Oh, I'm changing Bosco's name and I need your help: Just guess where Nicholas found him yesterday morning, c'mon. you know where. ON the tank. ON HYRUP'S TANK. He was looking down at him, his paw pawing the top of the cage, like he was trying to say, "I'll get you out, I'll try again." He has no idea that he will be strangled. The cat weighs 17 lbs. right now, so Hyrup really couldn't eat him, but he can strangle him. This cat, not so smart. he still thinks Nala wants to play with him. She hisses at him, ears back, tail fluffed, claws (all 14) out. He just tilts his head at her and walks up to her. He is our Special Ed cat. There is something to be said about the runt of the litter for sure.

Now I really don't want to see anything happen to him, because he is such a sweetie. And not to mention, it would be very tragic. The top of the cage is now properly locked in place. So hopefully, he will just forget the whole event happened. In the meantime, as long as we feed Hyrup, he grows; and Ball Pythons get very large. So I'm told. I just don't want him to eat my cats.


So here is where the fun begins, we need to give our Special Ed Bosco Bait Boy a new name




This is Bosco. And he is as sweet as he looks. We do not want him to become bait. But. he. is. stupid. Very sweet, but very stupid.

Monday, January 22, 2007

Missing: Friendly, loving pet snake.

Each morning when I get up, the first door I approach, is Nicholas'. I usually peek in at his sweet sleeping face and smile, and shut the door then go about my morning routine to wake Marisa, let the beast out, get my coffee, and so on. But not today. Today was going to be different. Today when I looked in Nick's room, the lighting was different, and I noticed immediately because I'm pretty keen on these things being anal and all.

Hyrup's cage sits directly at the foot of his bed. Yes the snake. In my baby's room. Now the snake, for now, is only a mere two-feet long. And I'm reminded of the conversation I had with the girl at PetSmart just a few days ago. She was probably laughing at me, now that I think about it. Because, I'm laughing at my stupidity right now. Ok, ok, I'm just jumping backward and forward and every which way. But that's what it's like in my head, in the room, and basically in any conversation you may share with me.

The cage: Typically, has a screen for a top, with a light that sits ON top of it, shining it's warm red rays inside to keep Hyrup warm and toasty. Not the case this morning. The screen AND the light were, well, the light was in the cage, and the screen was partly on and in the cage. The culprit - Bosco, our special ed snake bait two-year old cat! Who is now behind me, on Nick's bed meowing like he's telling me, "Yeah, that was terrible! I jumped up there, and the stupid thing fell in. So I let him out. You can thank me later. Why would you keep him trapped in there like that?"

Not really wanting to wake up the ever-energetic six-year old. But really needing to find the snake, I call on Marisa. "Marisa, Hyrup is missing!" She is up like a flash, no kidding! I now know how to wake up a teenager. Forget the alarm! Forget telling her it's later than it is. Tell her one of the animals are missing. The child was out of bed, I felt air and wind blow by me, it turned my body around. No kidding.

"Where is he?!" Now she's in front of the cage, frantic, like a Mother in a store who turns around not seeing her child for a second. Rather than turning on the bedroom light, she mistakenly turned on Nick's closet light, so now she's madly trying to find the switch to the light, to find Hyrup.

"Mom, where is he?"

Now the lights are on. I'm still trying not to wake the energizer power bunny up, but that has now failed - he is on to us. "What's going on?"

Knowing that he's going to want a warm source, I scan the heating coil, and find him. "Marisa, get Nick's flashlight, I see him!"

"No! It's MY flashlight!!" says sleepy selfish boy. (Where is that damn Nanny when I need her?)

Oh never mind, I have Cinderfreakinrisa. "Shut up Nick and give me the flashlight! We need it! Hyrup is missing."

(yeah, Nick, Hyrup is missing. You go girl)

For the weak at heart, who are afraid of snakes, I really did want to take pictures of this. And as we were rescuing Hyrup, I was saying to Marisa, "You realize, I must blog this you know." However, we were desperate in our attempt, it took 25 minutes, I hadn't had my freaking coffee, she needed to get ready for school. Wonder boy was desperately worried about his stupid Cars flashlight. Not to mention the tire we put in the radiator to hold it open so as not to gouge our hands as we pulled him out. (wait! did we get the tire out?)

This rescue was not for the faint at heart. She seriously thinks, and I do mean SERIOUSLY, thinks we should go into a snake rescue business. I reminded her of the 8 foot poisonous type. We had a hard enough time trying to uncoil him. Snakes are strong!

Meanwhile, special ed Bosco was watching and Meowing the entire time. And all I kept hearing in the back of my head was the conversation I had with the girl at PetSmart, "You have cats? And he doesn't EAT them??"

HMMMM........ So, I'm thinking. Bait! I realize this snake is going to get huge. She did say that, too. Let's see now, Philip has been extended three months. He goes back to Iraq, then gets out. So say the snake grows another foot. That boy needs to move that monster out when he gets out!!!! Or poor old bait boy is....uh, yeah, BAIT!!!

This cat has zero self-defense skills. ZERO, as in he refuses. When little Nala hisses at him, he just looks at her and tilts his head, like, "oh, c'mon I'm not bad, try me." and then he tries to walk up to her. And she attacks him. She is literally about twice his size. Or maybe more. Oh, and she has thumbs. She is mean. When she hunts, she removes their heads and their hind ends, AND their skin. really.

When Bosco hunts - he doesn't kill, he plays. He just throws them in the air and bats them around. It's hysterical; the mice are like, "Just kill me already!" They stand up on their hind legs and scream at him. And he just tilts his head sidways at them, and picks them up, throws them in the air and then bats them around. Meanwhile, they are suffering with a punctured liver or whatever, pissed off, waiting to die. Having watched some family member gone thru something terrible from the Godmother, Nala. The Don(na) of the neighborhood.

Sometimes they actually run to him, in a sacrificial martyr-like melodrama. But he just looks at them, head tilted, like they want to hurt him, and he backs away. Nala will be watching from a nearby bush; I know what she's thinking, she's a female, "Idiot! You'd never last if wasn't for me, buddy!" Then she prances her prance over, hisses at him, and BITES the head off of it. Leaves it, either at the front or back doors for me to find. Oh, thank you, Nala. Cats are disgusting. But I love mine. And truth be told, I really don't want to find them, in a large bulge, in the pit of Hyrup. That would be just devastating for all. I believe Philip would get a great kick out of it, but nobody else would.

Today, Hyrup gets a rat. Yeah, I know, gross. I don't participate in the feeding frenzy, but my kids love it. I told him it was his reward once we got him in his cage. And since he's now safely there, I need to hold up my end of the bargain. Hey, a deal is afterall, a deal. Snake, kid, whatever.

For the record, when Philip brought him home two years ago, I was totally freaked out. But now, I love the little guy. I used to have iguanas. They were cool. I walked them on leashes. I used to stop traffic with that one. They were beautiful. They never stop growing. Incedentally, neither, do some snakes. You can; however, contain their growth by their environment. We take Hyrup out of his cage, we handle him, so he remains friendly. We have a 'feeding' cage for him to enter, for obvious times. Like today. Allow your imagination go there for you so I need not elaborate.

My niece was here on Saturday and wanted to hold Hyrup while he was out. Of course, Jamie was reluctant. I can understand her fear, I used to be the same way. But if we allow children to be as fearful as we are, they grow up with the same fears. So Alyssa held Hyrup. And she enjoyed it. And Yes, she washed her hands afterwards. no fear of snakes. As for Jamie, that will take some work.

I used to have this faux ficus in my living room; and my iguanas loved it. They had their basking lamps in it during the daytime when they'd perch. So when people would visit, I suppose, to them, it resembled up-lighting or something. Until the branches would move. The iguanas would completely blend in. Because I was so used to having them, I would forget to warn tell my guests about my iguanas. So naturally, when they'd see the branches move, and the iguana, they'd pretty much flip out.

Today, I have no iguanas. Just a big stupid dog, who wants to sit in everyone's lap. (At all of 100 something pounds!) Two cats; the smaller of the two being the dangerous one, and the larger the special ed kitty. Then we have Hyrup, our snake. Whom we rescued this morning. Did I mention ever, that I wanted a bird at one time. If it wasn't for the screaching sound, I'd have one.

Philip desperately wants another bulldog. For the record, we do NOT have English bulldog here! We have American bulldog. The big stupid kind. The big stupid, lazy, wanting to lay in your lap or bed kind. All day long. Pitiful. Very loveable. Stupid. But loveable. Oh, and fierce. Yeah.



Saturday, January 20, 2007

Nostalgia

**** NOSTALGIC MEMORIES****


Close your eyes...And go back...
.Before the Internet or PC or the MAC......
....Before semi-automatics and crack....
.Before Play station, SEGA, Super Nintendo, even before Atari...
....Before cell phones, CD's, DVD's, voicemail and e-mail....
....way back....
....way.....way.....way back.....

I'm talkin' bout hide and seek at dusk
Red light, Green light
Red Rover....Red Rover.....
Playing kickball & dodge ball until the
first...no...second...no...third
streetlight came on

Ring around the Rosie
London Bridge
Hot potato
Hop Scotch
Jump rope
Duck....duck....GOOSE!!!
YOU'RE IT!!
Parents stood on the front porch and yelled (or whistled) for you
to come home -

no pagers or cell phones

Mother May I?
Hula Hoops
Seeing shapes in the clouds
Endless summer days and hot summer nights (no A/C) with the windows open
The sound of crickets
Running through the sprinkler
Happy Meals
Cereal boxes with that GREAT prize in the bottom
Cracker jacks with the same thing
Ice pops with 2 sticks you could break and share with a friend

...but wait.....there's more....

Watchin' Saturday Morning cartoons
Fat Albert, Road Runner, Smurfs, Picture Pages, G-Force & He-Man,
Schoolhouse Rock Watchin' Sunday morning oldies (Abbott & Costello, Three Stooges) Wonder Woman & Super Man Underoos
FONZIE.....AYYYYYYYY
Playing Dukes of Hazard
Catchin' lightning bugs in a jar
Christmas morning
Your first day of school
Bedtime Prayers and Goodnight Kisses
Climbing trees
Swinging as high as you could to try and reach the sky
Getting an Ice Cream off the Good Humor Truck
A million mosquito bites and sticky fingers
Jumpin' down the steps
Jumpin' on the bed
Pillow fights
Sleep overs
A 13" black and white TV in your room meant you were RICH
Runnin' till you were out of breath
Laughing so hard that your stomach hurt
Being tired from PLAYING
WORK: meant taking out the garbage or doing the dishes
Your first crush
Your first kiss (I mean the one that you kept your mouth CLOSED and your eyes OPEN)

Rainy days at school meant playing "Heads up 7UP" or
"hangman"
in the classroom, Remember that?

Oh, I'm not finished yet....

Kool-Aid was the drink of the summer
So was a swig from the hose
Giving your friends a ride on your handlebars
Wearing your new shoes on the first day of school
Class Field Trips with soggy sandwiches
When nearly everyone's mom was at home when the kids got there.
When a quarter seemed like a fair allowance, and another quarter a
MIRACLE When ANY parent could discipline ANY kid, or feed him, or use him to carry Groceries... And nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it.

When your parents took you to McDonalds and you were COOL
When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited you at home.

Basically, we were in fear for our lives but it wasn't because of drive by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! And some of us are still afraid of em!

Didn't that feel good? Just to go back and say, "Yeah, I remember that!"
Well, let's keep going!!
Let's go back to the time when...

Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-mo"
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "do over!"
"Race issues" meant arguing about who ran the fastest.
Money issues were handled by whoever was the banker in "monopoly"
Catching fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening
It wasn't odd to have two or three "best" friends.
Being old, referred to anyone over 20. (CRAP! I'm officially old!)


The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was cooties.
Nobody was prettier than Mom
Scrapes and bruises were kissed by mom or grandma and made better
It was a big deal to finally be tall enough to ride the "big people" rides at the amusement park.

Getting a foot of snow was a dream come true.
Abilities were discoverd because of a "double-dog-dare"
Spinning around, getting dizzy and falling down was cause for giggles.
The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team.
Water balloons were the ultimate, ultimate weapon.
Older siblings were your worst tormentors, but also your fiercest protector

If you can remember most or all of these, then you have LIVED!!!
Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from their "grown up" life......

I DOUBLE DOG DARE YA!!!!!!



"And all things you ask in prayer, believing, you shall receive." Matthew 21:22

Funny; my kids at 14 and 11 MUST let me know which of their friends have cell phones. Like I care, I think to myself. I'm sure if we budgeted, we could afford them the phones. But it's not the point. Really. To me, right now, I don't believe they are a necessity for them. They are not out of my arms reach for any real stretch of time. Nor are they too far from a phone, you know, the type where they'd need to deposit an actual coin. Dare I make them. Abusive arent' I?? They always manage to make the call they need to, whether from a friend's home, or from the school phone etc. Yes, the school does allow for the children to call home. Amazing isn't it!

We also do not own those fun and yet brainless (ok, this is my page and opinion) systems like XBox, and the rest of them. They seem to do quite well without them. Seriously. They enjoy, like we did, running outside with the other kids, and building forts out back in the woods. Mind you, the "woods" is the line of trees butted from my yard to the neighbors yard, and we can all clearly see the kids and hear them. So there is no danger involved, thankfully. But they are using - get this - their BRAINS!! And their hands, and their legs. Running, playing and having fun. outside. All of them. From ages 6 - 14. Sometimes the six year old comes home crying because he gets left out, but that's all a part of it.

The neighborhood behind us is a cul-de-sac; and we live on a busy street, so this is the ideal situation for play for all adults. For the kids involved. Ok, NOT the busy street!! Between us, is the hill, in which they get to sled on when we have snow. Like today. It's not too big, but when we Mom's and Dad's don't really want to go up the road to the big hill, it's perfect. All of the kids can meet out back, and sled.

When we first bought the house, the kids were a little bummed. We were in the ideal neighborhood! Safe, fun, family-filled stereo-typed place. They could pretty much come and go as they pleased. Everyone looked out for each other. We came here, to a busy street, knowing no kids. Boom! Little by little, the fun began. They each have someone to play with. Still, I'll never let my gaurd down completely; it is, afterall, an unsafe world we live in. Children don't go home to their parents, unfortunately. People have cruel and evil intentions.

If we go a minute longer than necessary without hearing from our children, we just freak out. If they hide better than they should, or play where they shouldn't, without letting us know, something takes over us. Something primal. Like instinct. We see red. Dare anyone who intends harm to them near us at that moment. When we find them, thanfully, unharmed and they are trying to explain themselves; we do not hear them. We are just moving fast and furious to the place of safety. For the primal mode has been violated. They are too young to understand that part of it.

And this is really where I was going with my statement today: I was watching good old GMA this morning, and this jerk Psychologist was deciding what a great (right) idea it would be to ban spanking! OK. And make it a LAW, of course, to throw parent spankers in jail, and call them, oh yeah, now I'm getting boiled - abusive!! Now, I'm becoming primal in a whole new way.

Spare the rod, spoil the child!! Let's take a little walk down memory lane, shall we?! Can we just look at the last generation and see where we're going before we make this a freaking law!! What are these idiots thinking? I mean, yes, I believe there are people who do NOT understand the difference between a spank and all out abuse, but now we as parents are going to be seen as oh, what?? just wondering......

I came from a generation of spanking. As a matter of fact, I can remember getting off the school bus, going to the principal's office and getting a good old fashioned 'rod of correction' applied to the 'seat of learning' for causing a scene. I didn't want to go. To school. I think it was first grade. The principal's office was nothing compared to the fear that awaited at home. I do remember as the day went on, my fate. My father, and the sound of his belt. That sound alone, would straighten me. I remember him saying, "This is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you." I surely didn't understand what those words meant.

Until I applied the "Rod of Correction" myself to the "Seat of Learning" to my own children. I never used a belt, like my father did. But I did actually have a rod. Marisa laughs as she remembers the rod. I'd probably land my butt in jail now. But amazingly, so far, she hasn't. Could it be, that it's because I applied a little direction? Perhaps. Or because it wasn't used in a fit of anger and/or rage. But in stern and loving discipline. Someone please call child services!

I see the differences in my friend's children; those that do and do not use the rod. What a difference in who runs the house. And the future of who will run our nation. Now that is what scares me. An undisciplined generation, who cannot control themselves. Who willfully control their parents, teachers, and society. Aahhhh, Generation Next. You be the judge.

As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord, and we will use the rod of correction when needed. With love, not anger. So there you have it.

Anyone for Kick-the-can??





Friday, January 19, 2007

OOOOHH OOHH Another Meme!!!!

Call me crazy, but I love these things! While visiting Jennine , I came across this Meme. Go ahead, do it. If for anything else, just give a little bit of yourself to the rest of us. I mean, this is what we're doing anyway! Exposing ourselves into the massive blogosphere to the unknown weirdo's right. Wow, scary when you put it that way.

I impressed myself with the "copy and paste" method!!!! (thanks Jennine!) Maybe I'm not as stupid iliterate (look, I did it again!) as I thought.

Ok, here goes



. Elaborate on your default icon. Ummm,??? What??

2. What’s your current relationship status? Frank, my husband
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3. Ever have a near-death experience? Oh, yeah!

4. Name an obvious quality you have. Nope! Then everyone will be on to it.
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5. What’s the name of the song that’s stuck in your head right now? Grey Street - Dave Matthews Band
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6. Name a celebrity you would marry. Not a chance. They don't last. I'm too high-maintenance anyway
7. Who will cut and paste this meme first? Harmonica Man (fingers crossed)
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8. Has anyone ever said you look like a celebrity? Frank says I look like Elaine from Seinfeld, but I don't see it ; although, I do have the push-and shove thing down.


9. Do you wear a watch? What kind? No, I have a cell phone for this

10. Do you have anything pierced? Ears, naval


11. Do you have any tattoos? lower back; mama frog over-looking 4 tadpoles, representing my babies


12. Do you like pain? very stupid question! I have an incredibly low-tolerance of pain; and a very short list of pain meds I can take. Sucks, considering the Migraine problem, huh!


13. Do you like to shop? HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE!!! I absolutely love a huge bag of hand-me-downs over going shopping ANY day! Ask anyone who knows me, or who has ever dropped me a bag.
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14. What was the last thing you paid for with cash? Does that include check?? Then that would be Nick's warm and fuzzy flannel sheets at the Mother station yesterday. TARGET!!!! does anyone else sense it calling???????

15. What was the last thing you paid for with your credit card? home depot!!! Not the actual place, but merchandise AT the place. you know, lamp, flashlight. Stuff. I loathe shopping.
16. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? Frank, he called to wake me up, and then to see how I was feeling.
17. What is on your desktop background? American Bald Eagle, with American flag and USMC logo. Not too patriotic.
18. What is the background on your cell phone? little guitar, and John 3:16
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19. What was the last movie you watched?In it’s entirety? Phantom of the Opera with Nick and Vanessa
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20. What was the last book you read? Birds of Prey, Nick brought it home from the library yesterday.

That's it??? That's the end of the questions??? Yes. Time to add more. I think I actually might have even hyperlinked up there! If not, I'm sorry for the mistake! But I tried. The last computer class I took was in the 80's OK!! Remember dotmatrix?? whoa.

On another note, it's snowing today! It is actually very beautiful and picturesque out there. I need to go to the dreaded grocery store. Oh, and the pet store to get poor Hyrup a new bulb. He's freezing his scales off. We are going to get sidetracked to Petsmart. We've never been. I can't wait. Although I do hate shopping, I don't mind getting sidetracked.


Thursday, January 18, 2007

Sidetracked. Again.

Well, I needed to go to the big pretty store anyway. You know the one; large bullseye over the front door, beckoning your name, if you haven't been there since before the giant Elf himself shopped for the kiddies. I think it secretly calls me in my sleep. Hey, maybe that is what the flashing was I saw lastnight.

I'm beginning to take a new angle on this whole aura thing. Maybe it's really subliminal. Maybe it's put there by say, NOT big pharma, but by big banka. Ya know. hey, somebody needs to make money right now. And by the looks of the place today, it wasn't happening where I was.

But, you know what? I didn't care. Me and the little guy had an adventure. I had started out of the driveway, on my way to the - say it together Mom's (ok, and Dad's!) - the grocery store!!!! Oh, live a little can I? I know, just wanting to be me today, aren't you. So there we were, on our way, list in my purse, ready to go, DMB playing and singing to ME, thankyouverymuch!! Just four houses away from mine, and the little bullseye comes to mind. For no apparent reason either. It wasn't on the list. Not on my mind. Not in the future. POP, there it was. and before I could even think about it, I just said out loud, "Let's go to Target and get you some nice warm, flannel sheets!"

And like a zombie, I was on my way. No thinking involved. Just drove. In fact, I don't recall the ride there. Funny, isn't it. It's all coming together now. Aura, short-term memory, blackout, spending spree. Hmmmm. No, it just couldn't be.

The place seemed so much bigger than I remember. I even grabbed the extra super deluxe cart, made for the multiple-child Mom. It was, remember, just Nick and I. I had super powers today. I was actually able to maneuver this demon on wheels quite well. Not bad for someone who refuses can't doesn't exercise. So there is no muscle mass in my body, whatever! Yes, I am skin and bone. But I did get the truck through the place, and Nick was proud. (So sorry little old lady. It wasn't my fault, she was bent over, I swear!!)

For anyone interested, they have their little Bavarian, Around the World Fair going on right now. Really cool stuff! We spotted some pretty things we would like to redecorate with. I believe I will see my son on HGTV some day. He has decided he wants to start collecting something. He hasn't quite decided what, he thought about the shiny pillows, and the collorful painted balls from Asia. Then there were the African safari animals, the the the and on and on........ He needs to find something of interest!!!!! I'm thinking DUST.

right, HGTV, he loves Giada and Paula. Is fascinated with helping me cook and clean. Yes, I do clean. Don't I? He enjoys the home improvement shows as much as I do. he loves Ty Pennington, although, I think it might be the hair and his amazing energy. Regardless, the child has great taste. Just saying, you may spot the boy on a show some day. Just say, you read it here first.

When Frank says I'm like a kid in a candy shop when it comes to making decisons, today was not my day. I actually did pretty stinking good. Now how is that for oxymoron?! This sentance is so totally screwed up, it makes perfect sense to me. Scary. Now, typically, when I'm in my worst migraine mode, I cannot for the life of me, make a decision. I will stop, stare and just stop! and I'm done.

Last weekend, Terri and I went to Wegmans together. Thankfully, she was with me, because, I never would have made it out alive. Or at least with what I went in for. I was in Migraine Hell. Confusion was written all over me. Example: try to pick out bandaids during an attack! can't do it. Impossible. why???? Well, because first of all, there are too many brands; store brands, commercial brands. Then there are the Dora, and Bugs Bunny, Cars, and Tweety Bird. (Wait, there's MORE!) Then, we have the sizes to worry about! Oh yeah, and latex. Clear or flesh or color. This is for bandaids!

I still need juice - grape, orange, cranberry, cranberrygrape, applegrape, ??????? what do I want? store brand $$$$$ See what I mean??

I was having a bad day. She was very helpful. She did the bandaids for me. and a few other things I absolutely couldn't have done! This morning, I ended up somewhere I wasn't supposed to go, did some shopping, got a few odd bargains. I ended up burning myself out, and now, I can't make it to the store. But that's besides the point. I'm feeling sidetracked again.

We did, however, make it to Home Depot. Which is where we needed to go to get Hyrup's lamp. Hyrup is the snake. I know, I know, some of you are now crawling out of your skin. (hey, Hyrup does that, too!) Sorry. but hey, he needs warmth. This is the part I was trying to get to when I came to the computer when I GOT SIDETRACKED BY MY HEAD! Just be thankful you're not me. It's even more frustrating trying to get away from the story when it's in my head. All you have to do it click that little "X" up there.

The best of today happened when I walked into Home Depot with my six year old little man, and he spotted a Cars flashlight. Now, he had asked me for a flashlight for Christmas; and the rotten Mom that I am, forgot about said light. I was so busy thinking toys, I forgot!!!! Thankfully, he hasn't once hung it over me. So he sees this HUGE, as it was, box with Mater and the gang just laying there waiting for these little boys to come along; and I swear, his eyes just bugged. He didn't ask for one, which was odd. He just showed me. Pointed to all of the characters by name. Well, I had to get it for him, remembering that I was a dud forgetting it at Christmas. So I said, "Would you like it?"

"REALLY?!!!?? YES!!!!"

He is just so stinking cute! He got his light. Proudly carried it through the store. Put it together when we got home. And when he gets off the bus from school, I'm sure he will be very proud to show it off to his sisters and Frank, and maybe take it to his Dad's house.

How wonderful to have nothing to care about but a flashlight. Or the color of your cup. Or who you sit next to at dinner. I wonder if it made his day more , or mine? Either way, it was a great way to get sidetracked.

For now, I'm going to try and tackle antoher Migraine. I knew it was coming. I saw the lights in my dream this morning. Bright, flashing lights in the upper right side of my head. Just around the pretty psychedelic dancing aura. I do wish I could animate them somehow. But my are they ever nauseating! UGH

Friday, January 12, 2007

Back again! YEAH

Well, we are back online; sporting a new, fairly used, yet waaaaaay updated computer. With too much gig, whatever that is for me to handle. The screen is so big, it's blinky. I need to use sunglasses. Seriously.

I'd like to thank those who have commented on my last post, because, well, first of all, any comments are awesome. But, mostly, this situation is really a sticky one. This isn't the first time this word has entered my vocab, nor will it be the last.

Unfortunately, my own folks (embarrassement inserted) use it on a regular basis, like I use commas. Actually, more than I use bad commas. And knowing full well, that Frank's children are, YEAH Dad, BLACK!!!!!!!!! Like it makes a difference. Oh, and the sick racial jokes he(my father) sends to his(Frank's) email box just kill me. But whatever. Some people just don't get it. Don't want to, don't care. that is the case in point here, I believe.

How do you stop complete ignorance in it's tracks anyway? Certainly not with ignorance, I've found. To me, personally, I refuse to lower myself to someone else's standards. Why serve rudeness with rudeness? It just festers more pain - for yourself. And they gain the upperhand in their quest for ignorance again. But there should be some kind of common ground; to make them come to an understanding of sorts, to help them to see the way of their words, as a knife in your heart. I suppose, in my case, it has been separation. and it really has made no difference. Because it has been earned.

At first, I was the one wounded by it. Slowly, I became hardened. Now, I am healed from their bitterness towards me. But not the anger and separation they show to my children, my husband and my step-children. Not the phoney affection that comes in it's form of materialism. My daughter's are too smart for this. They learned at a much younger age than I. My son refers to them, not as his grandparents, but as, "My Mom's, Mom and Dad." and it's not from lack of understanding. He is a very bright little guy for six. It is for a lack of their presence in his life. And my life. And my sister's life, her children's lives. Make no mistake, they have chosen who they will cherish as grandchildren, daughter, son; and, really, it's ok by me. I have no envy anymore. I've hung that green monster up. It's now my sister's turn, and my daughters' turns.

But when they choose to throw that word around my home, when they DO come around, I'll show them the door. Because that word, the "n" word, is not, I repeat, NOT welcome in my home.

Now I have a lot to learn on this new machine. Have a great weekend.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

The "N" Word

I received a heart-breaking call, no, actually, a heart broken call, from my step daughter lastnight. First, let me start by reminding those that may not know or remember; I have two wonderful step children who happen to be black and Italian. I love them like they are my own. She has a five-year old, Vanessa, who is just a trip and a half!! Can't say enough. Anyway, the call. She was crying, hysterically, her heart was just ripped in half. The father of her daughter, (not together), had made a racial comment. About her. He called her the "n" word. In front of Vanessa. Refusing to take it back, without apologizing. Stating he doesn't want her, the child, around, "those people."

Now, there is nothing, other than love her and Vanessa I can do. I would love to rip his tongue out of his throat. Not to mention, the very least of what her father wants to do at this very moment. But when all is said, which it has been, how am I supposed to act around him, LATER, when I have to? Right now, she doesn't want him around her until he apologizes. I don't blame her for that. She's absolutely right. But this will stick with all of us; mostly her. That hurt her hard. Hearing the pain in her voice lastnight was just awful. It was stinging.

So how does one go about continually overlooking the faults of those comments? This was the first time he's used THAT word. But his comments are not uncommon. His stupidity is not rare. His meanness, often unexpected. Like now.


What would you do? If this were your family? Really. Not in general, but real family, real life, flesh and blood. Put this in your daily life situation. Let it sink in somewhere. Put a word that fits in your vocabulary, one you prohibit, or dislike; allow it to fester under your skin. Use against a loved one, and tell me how to handle it. Because I know in my heart I'm to forgive him, and I must.... 70x7 and I know it was so cruel. I know judgement is not mine. Perhaps I just answered my own question.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Six Weird Things

"According to the rules... Each player of this game starts with the "6 Weird Things about You". People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says 'you are tagged' in their comments and tell them to read your blog!"

Oh boy, where do I begin? My kids are forever telling me I'm weird. My husband and friends say I have issues. I believe I am simply unique. Jennine over at Life in the Canadian Desert, tagged me for this, and I thank you, because, quite frankly I've had nothing NOTHING to write about. This should be interesting, here goes:

1. I, too hold my breath in tunnels; however, my fear is a bit stretched. When passing thru said tunnel and under train bridges, not only do I hold my breath, but I close my eyes and cover my ears, while making a humming sound, so as not to hear the train as it's crashing on top of me. Yes, while driving. I know, amazing I sill carry a valid license. My family laughs, while first-time passengers usually are stunned and freaked by such behavior.

2. I like to send odd house-hold objects to school with the Cat-mawler when she's not looking; for example, yesterday I sent her with a 5lb dumbell. Just a little something for her to find when she gets to school. She has found things like, dogtoys, Frank's slipper, wadded newspaper, balled socks, Nick's toys. You know, things you just wouldn't find in a bookbag of an 11 year old. Imagine the look of surprise on your childs face when they get to school and open their bag.

3. This is just plain fun! Going thru a drivethru, and order everything as if the speaker is broken. " I w. ll ....ave ..icken ....ggt, ... ies .. oke ...ith and no..... I repeat NO....., got.... at?" Then continue another order for several more people in car on seperate checks. Same way. NO LAUGHING. Which by the way, is impossible. Because you will be in hysterics. I also leave messages for people on their answering machines the same way. If you call from your home phone and cell, they really think it's the machine. I know, I still have friends too.

4. On the subject of answering machines; here's one I've put on mine: "Hello.....(pause)......hello??....(pause)....... Oh, hi there. Excuse me?...(pause).......... I'm sorry, you'll need to speak louder, you're breaking up.....(pause)......Oh, these stupid machines! Leave a message after the beep please and we'll get back to you later."

This usually leaves people stunned on too many levels. First, they think they're talking TO you, then they're yelling AT you, then they realize, they've been had after they've already been agitated. It's really quite entertaining.

5. I have the most organized shopping cart in the grocery store. Seriously. I have sections; canned goods, boxed, produce, dairy with my butter and cheeses in one area, and milk and half &half in another. Soap products, frozen. you get the idea. My cart is the epitamy of OCD/Anal Retension at it's finest. It is so orgainized, in fact, that when I get my one cart to the check out, they can't seem to understand why they can't fit it all back in, and need to get me, both another cart and a "helping hands" person to push and help unload it for me. Yes, I do have a neat and tidy organized grocery cart. I get strange looks from shoppers as I rearrange it so everything fits just so. I think they're just amazed at it's wonder. Hey, they could shop out of my cart!

When Frank shops with me, he's not so curtious about my cart, and he wants to just throw things in. I have to straighten them out. He just shakes his head at me. Sometimes he gets his own cart. Ok, enough of that

6. The Dreaded Public Potty (UGH) - I know I've posted on this before, so I'll do it quickrun version. Because, it just grosses me out to think about having to use it. Never use your hands for anything. Avoid it at all costs. Use elbow to open doors, shirt to lock. Squat, don't sit. Expell first foot of t-paper, it's contaminated, trust me. Flush with foot. Hold breath and get out QUICK. Those germs are going to be blasted 6 feet in every direction! Literally. Get papertowels under your arms, turn on water, soap up and wash. Dry hands, use towel to turn off water AND to open door. Drop towel. Purell hands outside of bathroom.

Purell is cheap and great! I have one on my keychain, in my purse. I have the wipes in my van, his car. The kids each got Purell in their stockings. We're weird that way. Germs are everywhere, and they suck.

So now I need to choose 6 people to do this meme. It's amazing what you can learn about a person really. We're not so different from one another. I can't wait to see what you write!Good luck, and have fun. view from the cloud, windlost, sassylime, the daily headache, life in the canadian desert, . I apologize for my inability to hyperlink. As stated before, I am not, I repeat NOT familiar with this at all.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

What a Day!!!

Who knew there were so many hours in a day to get so much multi tasking done in? Again. Actually, I was able to get my Christmas decorations packed away. (faint choir humming in the background). This has been done quite late for me. A task usually done by December 26. No joke. I'm known for it. So to have a naked tree sitting in my livingroom as I sit here and write this still, is just killing me. Frank thinks (and this is funny) that he will come home and take it out tomorrow. I'll be hearing that all week, thankyouverymuch, but that thing is history before Christina's bus hits the driveway!! I just might get up and make pancakes for the occassion! I didn't even take the lights off this year. For a buck a box, I'll sacrifice. It's the new me. Let the tree stay longer, screw the lights. I'll just get new ones next year. I was due anyway.

By the way, someone please (Robin, that would be YOU!) remind me next year when I'm going nuts wondering what I did with the lights, just remind me that's all.


If that wasn't enough, and by the way, that is a task! Although, there are still the trees out front that need to be put away. I did get the wreaths off the house though. Points for that. Anyway, there was the boatload of after holiday laundry; and just what gives with that?? I know I told these girls to bring their stuff down twice a week. It's amazing, I know they passed their passed hearing tests. And they do hear what they want to, but c'mon, I know they've heard this a thousand times. This was ridiculous. We do have, as everyone does now, a h/e washer and dryer which you can double loads in. Whatever. I still find myself doing 4 loads for 2 days. In a row. 2-3 times a week. Right, add that up. Just about every stinking time I turn around, there's another basket. No kidding they recycle their crap. And to think we were stupid enough to buy more CLOTHES for Christmas. What were we thinking??? Time to clean out the old ones when they come down! Oh yeah. Quality control, that's what I call it.

Then, can you believe it? (I know, my cape, trust me, it's pretty awesome) Cinderisa had a physical; so to the school and to the wait............ oh I mean the doctors office. It's a good thing we're on a good-friends-type basis. Otherwise, the incredibly long wait, just sitting there, for no good reason. At all. Other than to sit and, oh I don't know, maybe, say, get the stupid trees out of my front yard since it's now January 2nd...... yeah, in comes the good ole doc, blah blah blah......( no really I love him. Nice talk about kids, family and all. Oh and of course, Marisa good healthy stuff. Time to go now) More freaking waiting for another 25 STINKING (uh huh! really) minutes, just for paperwork and a freaking flu shot that I could have given her. And gladly would have after all of the freaking laundry I did!!! Ok, then to the lab for blood work. (My cape got caught in the door as I flew out )

THEN, I went to the grocery store. How mny have I lost by now?????? Went home, made dinner, brought kids to Dads, having wine here I am. Honestly, I feel like today, I put in 20 hours! And I didn't sleep again. Where oh where is the energy coming from? It must be coming from the aura! I don't know.

Here's a new one though. Now my food is changing taste. Not so new actually, it's always tasted weirder to me than anyone; but today, I actually took more note than usual. Like for instance, the tuna fish I was eating was great! White albacore, I was enjoying it, and all of a sudden, the flavor changed to this strange metalic and bitter taste like it was poisoned. I couldn't eat it anymore. I knew in my head, there was nothing wrong with it; but the same, I just couldn't eat it. And right before, well about half an hour before, there was the psychedelic aura I get at night. No migraine to follow. A little "boom-boom" but no major migraine like normal. But all night long, with the psychedelic aura, I had the most intense migraines banging my head and ear. For the past oh week, it's been going on. Then tonight, I made a stir-fry. Everything was fresh, and clean! It was delicious, and then, it was tasting like styrofoam and pungent. First the peppers, then the steak. I was done. Couldn't finish it after that. Then the boom-boom a little later. Nothing too bad though that I couldn't tolerate. Just a faint booming. Not like in my sleeptime. That is just terrible. Like around a 7; I can hear the sound of the pain and the swirls. But this was more faint and tolerable, a 4. More of a distant low drumming. They're changing. Still there, ever present. The aura, incredibly beautiful to see, and feel, taste for a moment. But then they turn on me into the monster. They morph. Like a Venus fly trap to the victim; very pleasing to the eye, until - trapped. That is what my aura does to me; it teases my senses, and then, when I least expect it, I'm trapped in it's claws and daggers of doom.


Well, at least I was able to get something accomplished today before the big storm takes me again. Now about those stpid trees.......

Monday, January 01, 2007

Happy New Year

I've been a boring blogger on so many levels. It's a wonder I get visitors. But I do. Santa was incredibly nice to me; I did get my digital camera - complete with dock, AND updated everything I could need to go with. I just haven't had the time or energy to figure most of it out. I have taken a few pics that are in the camera, and will probably stay there until I do figure it out. And until we update the computer, we won't be putting any pics into it. BUT, I do have one. I can't wait to use it. At least I can use it for my scrapbooking - whenever I get back to THAT!

I feel like I need to constantly get back to something. I used to garden, and I need to get back to it. I loved to scrapbook, yet I need to get back to it. Painting, poetry, writing - OK, nothing on any kind of professional level, but at least something I enjoyed for leisure and my kids enjoyed. A great stress-release if anything. I need, again, to get back to it. But when? I never seem to have either the time or the energy. For anything.

I've never been one for resolutions, but perhaps this should be the year for me to start a few. For time and energy. Finding them on some level. A little here or there, to do things I enjoy again. When I've found some time, I'll simply put it into something I like. But first, I need to make a few adjustments in my home - some major adjustments. Like in the organizational way. I used to be very organized, but that person has up and left me, and been replaced by someone who is very flighty and forgetful. I used to multi-task with ease and grace; if I try now, I forget what it was I was doing, making more of a mess than I started with. Frank tells me to just start with one room, and finish it. But one part of my brain still desires to multi-task, and run from room to room. And I get nothing done fast. And I tire easy from it. So I guess that is what I should do then! Take his advice, seek the time and energy, finish one task at a time. Sounds easy enough doesn't it. Trust me, my brain doesn't work that way, but I'm going to give it a try. Because it just hasn't been working my way either.

As far as the block went; not so much. I have been having the most beautiful psychedelic aura though. It's just too bad that they have such pounding effects afterward. And do I mean POUNDING! I give up. Even the Toradol didn't touch it. He said he could freeze it by putting a probe in for 3 months! Oh joy. But if this isn't working, what's the point really?

Well, Happy New Year! We all went to bed at 9. Again. We are a real bunch of partiers here, I know.