Thursday, May 21, 2009

This is Alexis; and no, she is NOT sitting on a toilet, she is getting a pedicure. By me. In her room, actually. Before the Prom. For anyone who knows me, I am NOT, I repeat, NOT NOT NOT a foot person. I abhor feet. Any and all, except for brand new baby feet, which I think are just adorable for reasons I don't know why myself, they are just the cutest. I do play with my cats feet. Oh and come to mention it, I like Isis' feet. I hate people feet. In all actuality, pets have paws, people don't, so that doesn't really count. I'm rambling. These are the conversations Frank hates to get into with me. I just go on and on. Forget what I was talking about. What WAS I talking about???

Oh, the pedicure. That's right, I gave Alexis, not to confuse you with Lexi, that is my girl, and she didn't go to the Prom, although that would be so much fun to have her all dressed up and stuff.......drifting again. gave Alexis a pedicure, complete with rubbing her feet, and I don't normally touch feet of any kind, but I rather enjoyed it. I painted her nails after buffing her feet. And she looked so pretty. here, I'll show you. But first let me just tell you about this incredible young lady, she made her own dress. Made. Her. Own. Prom. Dress. Amazing.

What an amazing girl. By the way, her parents were so nice to host the pre-Prom party and then the after-party for some of the girls.
The guys, so very charming! All dressed up and they were so nice and well-mannered.

Now Cinderisa decided she was going to do her own toes, and did not want the pedicure. She did let me do her hair. And I made her bracelet and matching anklet. Her necklace was a gift from Nonna from Italy. She looked so pretty.

What a beautiful bunch of girls. The weather really stunk for pictures! We had a terrible storm system come through the area and two tornadoes touched down nearby. So unfortunately, it rained all day long, and hard.

Today, my Lexi girl attended the Special Olympics (scholastic) and received a blue ribbon - 1st place for 35m race. She was very proud of it. Not too shabby for a little girl, rather young lady I was told would never walk.

I just love this picture of her looking up in the sun. It's too sweet. Just like her. She is the sweetest thing, really. So innocent and wonderful. I am truly a blessed woman to have such beautiful children. Thank you, Lord. What a wonderful gift.

On Tuesday I went in for my scheduled Cryo-procedure, and I'm quite certain he hit both nerves this time around. Oh yes, I'm sure of it. I went straight to bed when I got home from surgery, and my head felt as though my brain was short-circuiting. The "zip-zapping" was starting and the strangest of all auras that stream and fly and race around in the zig-zagging ways. The sounds that came along "whizzing" "buzzing" "whirrling" "humming" in the high-pitch and low-moan all at the same time. Undescribable really, and yet easy to see in my mind and hear. so so very hard to explain. Only someone who knows can really get it, or explain it, or understand what I mean. If I'd never encountered it before, I'd swear I was going crazy. But I'd been in this aura and meanness of migraine too many many MANY times before. The clutching of the claws around my scalp, the gouging of my eyeballs as they are being blown out of their sockets. The fork tines as they scrape their sounds in my ears and ring in the heart of my teeth.

Where do the sounds come from? And from nowhere? How can I be at complete peace in one instant, and then so totally engulfed in intoxicating agony the next?? Blinded by shooting light and beams and what ARE they exactly?? The spinning squares. The darts. Where do they come from? Oh, and the voices that suddenly make complete sense of well, everything! An awakening of sorts. So surreal. All gone by the time it's over.

Today, I feel exhausted and just hanging by a thread; at the point where I'm anxious to get back to my regularly scheduled life - whatever that is. But too afraid to do too much, in the event the migraine comes back. Too tired to do any of it. I am hoping this cryo will work and hold on for a good, long time.

For now, my doctors, both pain and neuro are looking into neuro stim devices for me, the drugs are failing. And yet, the insurance company may just say "NO!" altogether. Not just to the devices, but to us, in general. We like many others out there, are in jeapordy of losing our pension. We are losing our dental and optical come July. But I'm not a pessimist, I don't worry about such things. When Frank gets worried, I tell him, not to worry, because the Lord knows what is at hand for us already before we do.

I am a blessed woman. Yep, I have miserable migraines. Everyone has something. My garden is blooming. I have been in it this year! My kids are awesome. Healthy. Smart. Love the Lord. Love their Mom. They still ride in the same car with me, and talk to me. with their friends in the car. I hear that other kids their age don't do this. weird.

wishing you a painfree day

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