Ch.. chh.. chh...chhanges

Look at the sweet little table I found at a garage sale for only $4. Well, he wanted $8, she said $5 when I requested the 4, and told me to, "just come back later and see if it's still here." So as I started to walk to the van with an, ok then attitude, he said, "$4 works for me!"

Isn't it cute? So I sanded it down, chucked the ugly knob (ka-nob), and am now in search for a very pretty colored glass, sparkley one. Oh, and I do not yet know what I am going to do with said table.

First I thought I'd just dry paint it a nice serene cream color; but no, that is just too predictable and boring. I think I want to try something a little more fun and flashy. A little more wild and cranky and unpredictable.

Did I mention that we are changing the kids' roomS around? As in ALL of their rooms! So here is how the move is to take place: Christina will be moving to Marisa's room; Marisa will be moving to Nicholas' room; and Nicholas will be moving to Christina's room. Naturally, all themes will be scratched for new, updated themes. Only one room will be painted - thankfully, the smallest of the three, which will be the most complicated and the most fun - Nicholas' room. He wants it in a camouflage theme. Can't wait. Well, actually, I can totally wait.

Christina and I did some shopping for her room yesterday - she is going with a retro black, hot pink and white/cream idea. Very pretty. Very Girly, and Very Christina.

Naturally, Cinderisa has yet to find her theme.

Marisa made her sister a birthday cake yesterday, and a birthday hat. I can't believe my little blondie is 12! She also took care of her brother while I took Christina out for a day of shopping, which is tradition on your birthday. We ran. all. day. long. And she was just as exhausted as I was. I couldn't believe my ears when she said to me, "Mom, no wonder you tell me you're too tired to go anywhere. I'll never ask you to take me out at night again!"

But I assured her that she definitely could. poor thing. We just wore each other out!

Marisa did an awesome job with Nicholas, Vanessa and Jasmine; not to mention, Frank wasn't feeling well. She made lunch, cleaned up after them and lunch, had them helping with cake; mowed the lawn, cleaned her room, Nick's room, kept order with three arguing little children. Then put together dinner because I collaped with a migraine when I got home and needed a 40 minute nap before everyone arrived for cake and ice cream.

So, why do we call her, Cinderisa?

Aren't my girls beautiful!? Ok, usually Marisa, well sometimes, Marisa does something with her hair - like she lately has this natural wave style going on, and it is sooooo pretty. I don't know WHAT this style is. But hey, that's ok, because if it's unattractive to the boys, too, great!

Almost forgot - I may throw my toothbrush away for good!! Why??? Because I just bought a Sonicare from my dentist and I absolutely LOVE it!! My mouth has never been so clean. Seriously, I love it! I recommend it. But put it in your mouth before you turn it on, because it is messy.

On the migraine front - things are weird again. Naturally. I should probably call my neuro (I'm saying to myself) actually I did see him a couple of weeks ago; but things are getting increasingly ummmm, odd.

The aura are changing, and my right side has been sort of losing it's grip and feeling; and then the migraine comes. I feel like a part of my brain has disappeared during all of it, and I can't distinguish up and down, right and left. If I'm standing in the bathroom while it's happening and I need to get to the bedroom, I become stuck (in my head) but my feet won't go forward. I can't really explain it any better than that.

I try to move them, I look like a horse prancing her feet, but it just won't walk forward. I can feel the movement going. Down the entire side of me is this weird sensation of electric nothingness. And my stomach - oh my stomach how it burns and hurts and churns. It has happened before all of this. Could the meds be losing their effects again? Oh, yeah, probably.

When the migraine comes after the silence, the cave-like, scoop of nothing that disappears from my brain; it comes on like a plane crash, or a bomb drop - searing itself in. Hot, hard, fast, loud, intense. Deeper and deeper, harder and harder it pulses. Like right now. It's crippling the way it shuts me down.

A Little FYI for Your PMS Migraine

Naratriptan Tolerable Long-Term for Menstrual Migraine Prophylaxis


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NEW YORK (Reuters Health) Jul 05 - Naratriptan twice daily is well tolerated when taken for 6 continuous days per month for up to 1 year for the prevention of menstruation-related migraine, results of a study indicate.
"For many of the approximately 18% of US women with migraine, menstruation is a predictable trigger of migraine attacks," note Dr. Jan Lewis Brandes, from Vanderbilt University School of Medicine in Nashville, and colleagues in the June issue of Headache.
While naratriptan is not approved for migraine prophylaxis, it has been shown to be significantly more effective than placebo for short-term prevention of menstrual migraine, they point out.
Dr. Brandes' group studied the tolerability of naratriptan 1 mg twice daily starting 3 days before the expected onset of menstrually related migraine and continuing for a total of 6 days. Women in the study had the option to use an additional 2.5-mg dose for breakthrough migraines.
A total of 457 women took at least one dose of naratriptan on study; 318 and 131 completed 6 and 12 months of treatment, respectively.
According to the investigators, the only adverse event occurring at an incidence of more than 2% during the 6-day treatment periods when 1-mg BID naratriptan was taken was ear, nose, and throat infection (3%) -- even when an additional 2.5-mg dose was taken.
There were no serious drug-related adverse events recorded and no patients experienced clinically relevant drug-related changes in electrocardiograms, vital signs, or clinical laboratory tests.
Furthermore, women reported that they did not have a migraine in roughly 50% of perimenstrual periods during which naratriptan prophylaxis was used. The efficacy of naratriptan for menstrual migraine prophylaxis did not wane over time in the 131 patients who remained in the study for the full 12 months.
"Results suggested that naratriptan reduced headache impact when used for up to 12 months for the short-term prevention of menstrually related migraine," Dr. Brandes and colleagues also report.

Ciao Ciao Zio

On Wednesday, our Zio left to go home to Italy. We miss him. We had a wonderful time getting to know him and love him. Teaching him interesting ways of our American heritage. Frank especially; they had a very unique bonding of their own, travelling to see Philip come in from Iraq.

He was able to visit Frank's brother in Maryland, so he did some travelling on the East coast, which is what he intended. He took hundreds, literally, of pictures. Visited the kids events, and recorded them. Went to wine country - he likes his wine. He loves hot sauce and barbecue and he absolutely loves Walmart. With an inate passion. He may miss that more than anything. He is 79 years old, and gets around like he's 59! He is so full of life. I miss him.

The next pictures will have snakes!!

When he first visited us, the kids brought the snakes out, and naturally he was frightened. Marisa talked him into petting them. He did. Well, last Tuesday when he was here, Philip decided to walk around with one on his neck, so...........

naturally, he wanted his picture taken with the snake on HIS neck. How cute is he!!! So when he did it, of course.........

Nonno had to get in on the action. How cute is he?? Now, Nonna doesn't like the snakes At ALL. She thinks they are disgusting and tells us so everytime she sees them. She doesn't want them near her, in any way, shape or form. You Understand Me!!

So.... when Philip did this, she was trying to get away, but he was pulling her back. Notice Hyrup, the snake moving toward her ear. Poor Nonna. I felt bad for her, while I was TAKING the picture. But it was too funny NOT to. It's not a smile on her face, believe me, it's total fear.

He loved Rocco, too. He called him, Rocky. We will miss our Zio Corrado. Philip, too. He is back on base, getting retrained for something, different.

Frank is now home and working his leg and body hard; trying to get it to work and bend. It's an amazing thing this new improved knee. It's amazing how fast he is healing. It amazes how hard he pushes himself to get better. You go, Frankie!

As for me, my little aura are playing like the game Centipede. That is what they look like now. And my balance has been playing "off" lately. A little hemi was thrown into the pool of migraine again for me on Friday. It's been a year since I had one of those. I woke again toda;y with the centipede-aura, and the right side is just a little;.....weird again for me. So, here we go.

Hoping everyone else better days

Deborah

A New Visitor for Frankie, sort of

So, poor Frank has been in the rehab center for a little over a week now. No, he's not in because he has a problem with illegal drugs -YET - although, they do have him on lot's of narcotics at the moment.

He had his knee replaced on the 18th of June. Yeah, ouch. Does anyone else pronounce the work "knee" as ka-nee when you see it spelled out?? Anyhoo, Rocco has been sort of wondering, well, that is if dogs do that sort of wondering thing; he's been following me around when I blow in and out of the house the way I do these past two weeks. It's been pretty freaking crazy!! Literally and seriously.

Thankfully, and I do mean, THANKFULLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Heavenly choir (in my head) singing in the background; my kids are gone. for. the . weekend. They were dropped off lastnight to their Dad's. Who also, was in the hospital, at the same time that Frank was. Interesting, I know. (I had nothing to do with that!) We get along quite well.

How many women can say that they had the opportunity to spend the evening, in two different hospitals, with two different husbands? Let me just tell you; it's not at all it's cracked up to be, and I did it only one time. I hate running around. And it's all I've done since poor Frank ended up getting his kanee tore open and replaced with the new and improved titanium baby. That had better last the 20 years they say it should. Or I may end up in a pasyche ward. Or under a bridge on lot's and lot's of illegal drugs. Who knows.

Oh, where on earth was I going with this; hang on, back to the top. Right, the dog and the visit. Each and every time I leave, the dog gets crated; which he just sincerely loves. Think bribe. So today was going to be different for good ole Rockhead. Today I was going to treat him to the R..I..D..E; which of course cannot be said allowed for obvious dillerious reasons - think clearing of the coffee table, spit-flying and mad-dash by the 100lb beast. This needed some careful thinking.

As it was, Frank had already needed MY, or rather a better cup of Jo than what the rehab ctr offered. So I got the call to come, and I needed to rescue. Dogs are onto our cleverness, no matter how hard we try to conceal what we're up to, they are on. to. it. He saw thru me, all the way. And I didn't look at him the entire time I was getting clean shirts, and coffee and packing things to bring. But this big oaf KNEW he was going. Let me tell you, it's been a long time since he's been in the van.

Anyway, clearly he enjoyed himself. It's been nearly two weeks since he's seen his Daddy, and I thought he'd pee himself when he saw him. (the dog, not Frank) Frank has rather good control of that. It was a very nice little reunion. Who knows, maybe he'll get to go back later. Maybe! In this last picture, he felt like he had to protect his Daddy each time the door opened up. The staunch protector that he is - yeah, that's him!!!

ME????? Come On!!

Well, thank you very much. I must say that I'm quite shocked, to say the least. And a little embarassed. Is that weird? That's me! Mostly weird.

I started this blog to sort of just get my pain down on the computer, and just hook up with other people, like me - in constant, unrelenting head pain - to just vent and oh, I don't know, share stories.

Now, I mostly share stories of my family, and throw in a migraine here or there if I feel like it. They are still with me, unfortunately; but I like the stuff my family gives me better. Let's face it, family is always entertaining.

I am honored to be given this award, I'm all giddy inside, and can't wait to show my neuro next week! Thank you to anyone who stops by here for a read. Don't forget to check out the other winners and the other great blogsites on my sidebar.

OH, and Frank is scheduled to come home on the 3rd! Keep up the good work Frankie!!! YEAH!!

Deborah

Update

Thank you all for your emails and posts on Frankie. He has had some setbacks, but is doing much better now. He'd been fighting an infection and blood clot; but, not anymore thankfully!



He goes to Physical Therapy in the morning, which is complete torture, as you could imagine. And then he's off to Occupational Therapy in the afternoon. He has been in a rehabilitation center since last Thursday, and it's right up the road from the house. Thank God!



I've been going twice a day with Nicholas, who runs up and down the halls when we get there. And the girls come when their schedules aren't too busy. He is mostly bored, so he is doing what he does best, sweet-talking the nurses. I haven't been there to get any recent pictures of therapy, but he is doing great. No marathons, Jeff.

It's amazing how far orthopedics has come! He was up and walking the evening of his surgery. I still don't believe it.

Thank you again for your concern and well-wishes.

Deborah

The Bionic Knee

No, he's not taking ballet lessons! Though he does look cute in his tights, tee hee. He's actually squatting up and down to stretch his muscles.

And here, he's pulling his leg in as close as he can. "Come on, Frankie, you can do it!! Pull harder!"

Now that is one straight leg! Amazing. On Monday, MONDAY; this man had a total and complete knee replacement surgery. Look at him. He is up and walking. It is not, by any means an easy task. I give him a lot of credit. He's in pain, and he is working hard; but he's doing it.

Go Frankie, Go!! Don't worry, I will take lot's more pictures of his progress.

People there thought I was crazy for doing this - HA! They'll wish they had someone doing the same for them. And they should really, showing them their own progress. They deserve it. This is life-changing surgery. I know this is going to change things for Frank.

He will be able to walk again; take walks. Play basketball, go for a run with Marisa. Ride bikes with me. These are things people take for granted, that can't do them. I look forward to these days with my Frankie.

For now, he must work very hard just to make each new literal baby step. To build muscle that hasn't been used. To strengthen those that have weakened.

I am proud of him for going forward and following thru with this very big and painful surgery.

And anyone else who must go through it.

Deborah

So What Happens Now

This is the emblem that we have embraced; the sign of Marine. The Proud and the bold. The fierce fighter. The pillar of strength. We had this on our desktop for months while Philip was in Iraq, as a symbol of who he is - a Marine. Of what he stands for - the Brotherhood of our Nation.

We knew he would come home a little less the pillar. Scarred from the battle. He warned us that something had changed. He was fearful of the jumping inside himself.

It's called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - Iraq - because, well, that is where he was stationed; in so many words. And for safety reasons.

And while the military "offers" help for these soldiers, finding it for them available, and getting it to them isn't what you would think it should be.

In the distance, on Friday evening, we could hear fireworks. I knew they would be going off because Marisa was marching in a parade for the festival that led up to them.

Philip; however, heard something completely different. In his mind, he was taken back to the desert. He was bunkered down in his fatigues for a moment. In his mind, he could smell the sweat, hear the blasts, taste the sand. And he froze. He shook as he asked his Dad what the sounds were. In his mind, they were the sounds of gunfire. In his mind. He knew the exact weapon, artillery, range, direction it was coming from. How long it would take for him to get his weapon loaded and ready. In his mind, he was there.

He came in the house, and Frank explained to me what happened, and by this time, we had fireworks going off in two seperate areas, the poor kid! In like a 10 mile radious north and south of us. He sat next to me on the couch, and the couch literally was shaking from his frustration. I felt so bad for him, but I just kept my calm, because with Philip, well, he is a Marine all tough and cool on the outside.

I very calmy explained to him, very slowly, that they were indeed fireworks. That there had been signs posted for them for weeks and Marisa was away in a parade and she had told him about it. He did remember her telling him about the parade, which made him feel somewhat better. Somewhat. But the shaking continued. As long as the fireworks.

With each crack and boom, he would tell me how the sounds reminded him of a bomb or a gun sound. I just listened to him and explained that it would get easier with time. I wonder, will it? I see the horrific stories of others that are struggling and I wonder if they too started like this.

When will it become a priority for our soldiers to get the help they need, when they get home? Will it be when they've become a menace to society, or when Walter Reed has just become to over-crowded with psych patients? Wait, isn't Walter Reed already in crisis? My bad.

Something needs to be done to help our vets!

Pain Sucks out LOUD

Oh, the things I subject myself to - for the sake of pain relief. The last being the very large Star Wars like beam that was thrust into my skull. . . . yeah, I'm still waiting. Still waiting for the pain to LEAVE ANY TIME NOW!!!! So, what do you do for pain relief??

I've gone to Boston. I've Been to the Great gods in Michigan for a full month of head-on, full-blast and full-blown, to the core, top of the line treatment folks. I learned so very much from the good gods there, but unfortunately for me, not much else , as far as pain relief, was accomplished.

I've had facet blocks, occipital blocks, nerve blocks, cryoanalgesic (the latest and greatest); I've been a virtual pin cushion voodoo doll for pain therapy. Yet, not getting pain relief. Yet. But there's still hope, right?

I've tried massive amounts of drugs, in all sorts of combonations, and had too many adverse reactions to too many drugs to even put down here. My combination of drugs that I CAN safely take is actually easier to write. I. am. the picture of an adverse reaction. My middle name is anaphylaxis.

Oh, boo freaking hoo. I know. I'm entitled to cry out just a little bit here. I am afterall, in agony once again. And frankly, I'm tired of it. Again. Feeling a gap closing that was looking open. I suppose that is the chronic lifestyle, isn't it. Don't get too comfortable in that normal-looking skin; it changes.

Hey, at least I found a pretty new nail polish to wear while I look and feel like crap. If only I can muster the energy and the tolerancy of the smell to put it on! You know, a girl's gotta look good! I do have my priorities; toes, fingers, clean sheets.......oh, and clean car windows are an absolute must have! Which reminds me, I need to wash the passenger window in my van of the dog snot. I know, gross.

Oh, speaking of pain! Frank. Not that Frank is a pain or anything, but Frank is having or rather going to be having a LOT of pain!! He will be getting a brand spanking new knee on the 18th! Yeah for Frankie!!! He needs it. Cause his knee is like shot, totally. I'll get a really good picture of the now and for sure some of the afters. And you know I'll be getting some of him in rehab. Poor guy.

Suffice it to say - our vaca in Va Beach - well, it ain't happening this year. Bummer for the kids. But, hey, the beach ain't going anywhere right! Health trumps vacation; that's the way we look at life here. That's the way we needed to last year when I couldn't go. and let's face it - there is no way he will be ready to travel by July. boy are we going to be a barrel of laughs.

Happy Day to someone out there.

Home, At Last

Well, Our Marine is safe at home. Here is with his very happy Dad and a buddy, Jake. (Jake is on the r, Dad in middle, Philip on the left) In this next pic, he's posing with his very adorable nephews. It was a steamy, hot day yesterday. The event was a graduation party. Even Rocco came. He made "friends" with a taco dog-a chihuahua.

Anyway, just wanted to post a few pics of our Philip. We are so thankful to have him home. Thank you for your prayers and to Jackie who was so thoughtful, to send him a Christmas card - thank you so very much! Your generosity means the world to us. You just don't know, thank you again.

God Bless the USA!

Hide and Seek

This is a little game of Hide and Seek. If you look real good, and I mean REALLY good, you can see a small creature in the picture. (hint, it's NOT the frog) Maybe if I give you say, another angle.......
Does that help? Let me just say that it was 90 degrees yesterday at 3:15 when I took this picture. Here. In my garden.

He was trying to evade the sweltering heat; and he is just too adorable for words. He did eventually make his way out, forgetting what he was doing.

We have come to realize that Bosco suffers from short-term memory loss. No joke. If he is outside, he will come to the door and beg to come inside; followed IMMEDIATELY, by the cries to go outside. Only to start over again by walking the length of the sidewalk, falling over, rolling, and coming back to the door and the crying again begins. This is an all day occurrance with Bosco.

At first we thought maybe he had a little kitty screw loose. But he just really resembles Dory the fish from Nemo. Short-term memory loss. Actually, Bosco and I don't really fall far from the same tree afterall. I find myself going from door to door and room to room, wondering why and where and what in the world I was doing, where I was going! What AM I doing next??? And why? I don't really remember. I just look at Bosco, he meows and rubs my leg. We walk to the door and wonder together. Maybe I should hide under a bush! Go figure - HA!

And as if parenting couldn't be any more fun!!! Tomorrow is the "Semi" at Cinderisa's school. Why they have this event really is beyond me actually. She is 14, in 9th grade. When I was in school, (here I go sounding like. my. parents. again.) right, we had the Jr. and Sr. Prom/Ball. no semi or anything like. We had dances once a month, which were fun.

Now, they have the Semi. Girls are expected to glam it up, parents are expected to allow it! For reasons, I won't spell out, we decided not to. Naturally, Cinderisa isn't going to this ball, and she is crushed. I understand her being very hurt, misunderstood, and all that goes into the teen feelings. However; I'm not for the manipulating teen parent-to-parent, shall I say parent-against-parent rally she is bribing. In this case. So she is, shall I say, learning a very hard lesson in teenhood. And I in parenthood. Either way, it sucks. She wants me to cave and let her go, because, afterall she has, as she says, "learned her lesson."

A part of me wants her to go and have fun with her friends and all that goes with it and on and on; but there is the conviction of the reasons WHY we said, "no" in the first place. To those reasons, we must stick. Sometimes parenting just plain out - SUCKS!

But I love her too much to fold. And though I cringe when I sound like my parents, I suppose it's a parental ring; and she too will jolt to it. So until her Jr Prom and Sr. Ball come around, she is going to have to wait, like we did, or I did.

Really, why must they rush to grow up? Why can't they stay little a little longer? She is going to be 15 this year! She only has three years left of high school, and I cannot believe it as I am writing this. It really does fly.

Yesterday, she said she was seriously considering teaching Special Needs Children. Well no kidding Miss Marisa. It is such a gift this child has been blessed with. And not only her, but the kids she works with on a daily and weekly basis in school. She has been working with Special Needs kids since the elementary level. It doesn't surprise me at all. She has a true heart, a caring and loving heart for them. And not just for Special Needs children, but for children in general.

Unlike the Cat Mawler, she will play with Nicholas and Vanessa - actually play with them. Yes, she gets irritated with them, she is 14! But she is generally nice to them. Chris, not so much. It's a battle for her to be nice. at. all lately.

Girls are mean. Boys are icky. Parenting is sucky business. At least Philip will be home tomorrow night! He will be able to toss in some reality to the big picture for them. I'm sure of that.

Here is someone sweet and lovely: This is Zio Corrado from Italy!

He will be with us for another month. Lastnight, we took him to Marisa's band concert. He enjoyed it, although he was very frustrated because he couldn't see her. She plays the drums, and she is in the waaaaay back of the orchestra. Their drumline also performed, which he really enjoyed. He is obsessed with Walmart, so I will be taking him there today to get more pictures developed. He has a seriously cool camera.

Ciao

Deborah

Marisa's First Parade

Memorial Day

This was the only flag I saw flown at half mast. I guess we were the only little village that did so. When I saw that American flags were replaced by swasticas, not once, but twice; not only did it make my stomach turn, but it enraged me. Where are the cowards now? Why do they do it in hiding? If they have something so loud and hateful to say, why not do it with a voice and a face?

Like Mother, Like Daughter. I believe that is the saying. Anyway, she marched in her first parade on Saturday, and I took lots of pictures. So she made a funny face for this one. Stinker.

This is Cassie, Marisa's friend. The 'other' blonde. I took lots of pictures of her, too. This first one, she smiled. By the end of the parade, she was rolling her eyes at me. Some vets, and a very serious picture of Marisa/aka/Cinderisa.

so serious. not wanting to be photographed.

A smiling picture of Philip at the beach in NC last week! He will be here in just a few days. Doesn't he look great? (oh, yes, girls he is single!)

Here he is with his Dad, Frankie. We cannot wait to have him home. We are so proud of this young man, and all of our soldiers; past, present and yet to serve. We humbly thank you all.

I had the great priveledge of taking down his yellow ribbon on Saturday. His Nonna wanted to leave hers up until he could see it. I suppose some will leave theirs until all of the soldiers return. Perhaps, I may invest in another for that reason. For now, I will go without, for OUR soldier is home on American soil. We will; however, continue to pray for those who are not.

Hey, on a bit of a good note; I am feeling some relief from the procedure I had last week. YEAHHHHH! Next week I go for an Occipital block and schedule the same procedure to be done on the left side. The residual stiffness is wearing off, slow but sure. And the spike is fading to a more dulling blow than the rather searing kind it usually sends. Hopefully, this will last for the three months it promises. One can only hope. If not, well, it doesn't.

He still is talking about the stimulator, and I must say, I'm a bit more reluctant to do so. As in, not at all interested. Thankfully, so is my insurance company. Naturally. No shock there.

Ok, time to feed the animals.

The Pretty Little Migraine

The pretty things that migraines are made of: they usually start with little specs and sparkles; remember, you're not sure if you see that distant light. You know you don't want to see it; and as sure and as fast as it appeared, it is just as quickly gone. With eyes closed, you search for it.

With modern technology, being what it is, I used Photbucket, and these are the prettiest pictures I've come up with, and the closest to my own aura to show you, my internet blog friends just what it is to live a moment in my migraine. No two are alike. And for those that experience them - WARNING! SOME ANIMATIONS DO AGRIVATE MIGRAINE!

Once the spark and/or spec, or little light has had it's fun and games with it's disappearing act, it has now decided to bounce around just a little and add some color and sound. I have no sound effects.

Now this little gem usually only comes in red and a muted grayish yellow. And is always and I mean, ALWAYS, followed by nausea. (like now, if I look at it, it's making me real queazy.) There is also the sound of a screaching, distant brake, not like anything I've ever really heard before. It comes on the right side, pierces my ear - to the effected side, of course - and is followed immediately with the most intense and excrutiating blow to back of my neck, which then is followed by a force trying to work it's way from the back of my head and out of my eye. And at no great speed, I might add. It is all in a very slow and agonizing motion.



At the moment, my shoulder blades seem to be trying to touch each other and in unison, are trying to become one and grow into , oh I don't know, my eyebrows maybe. The tension that has been building from lack of sleep, cryoanalgesia (pleaseohpleaseohpleasework!!!), everyfreakingday stresses (not even going there), and just plain tired of feeling like this day after day after freaking day.



No, don't get me wrong, I do have good days. And I do thank my Lord for them. But I hate dreadfully the bad days. Oh, here's a great picture!


The spike in the lower part of the picture; that is the one that drills the top of my head on an almost daily basis! Yes, that is the one. Slowly, and steadily it is pounded and pounded into the top of my head. And I cannot touch it, for it brings more pain to touch. Just leave it alone.



This morning when I got out of bed, there was darkness on my right side, followed by the numbing; in my mouth and down my arm. The sparkles and the spirals were there all night, along with the tension and the blows to the back of the head. I do believe that it may take some time for the procedure I had done on Thursday to work it's magic. Hey, if not, ther's always the infusion center.



In reality, I am tired of filling my body with drugs. I resent the idea that I must depend on so many of them to get through the day, to ward off just a little more pain. And sometimes, most times, it does me no good.





This is what today is looking like. It's sure looks pretty, doesn't it? As long as you don't suffer the fate of Migraine it does. But if you stop and stare long enough, or better yet, if you just take a quick peak, if you're one of me, it quickly sickens the stomach and brings on the pain. The numbing and tingling. The distant stare begins. I wonder if the person who made these pictures suffers like I.

Cryoanalgesia - what fun, what fun!

This is the Probe! Actually, I saw the probe my doc used and it was twice as long, seriously, as this one. No kidding. Twice as long. I'm not sure why; and I'm not sure why I looked. This was the second time I've gone for this procedure, and I believe it's working. I suppose that's why I've gone twice. At least it's taking some of the edge off. I think.

It's also possible I may have it done on the left side. Call me crazy, no seriously, call me crazy. The first time I had it done, I opted out of the Versed. The Versed, although a wonder drug for making one extra sleepy and forgetting what's going on; exagerates my migraines. So this time - Just give me the Versed already. I'll deal with the migraine, and I did. Like always, every stinking day OF MY LIFE! oh, boo hoo.

So in short, here is what he does: Versed, yum, (at first). Then he makes this nice incision in my occipital lobe. Yeah, the back of my head - oh I have lot's of curly hair, which he is jealous of and makes comments of shaving me each time he sees me. He's bald. He is not shaving me.

Then comes the fun part, more Versed to get, uh comfy and stupy, but still feeling pain. The long probe has now entered the back of my skull to freeze the nerves that are causing me so much freaking PAIN!! Wait, so is the probe. AH AH AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Zap zap zap.

So is it worth it? I suppose I'll find that out over the next few weeks. As for now, the pain on my left side is becoming more unbearable, and I'll be getting an occipital block on the 12th and he'll be scheduling me for the cryo (yipee) on that side.

Here's hoping it WILL work, as we are planning on vacation this year. Which means driving to Virginia Beach, despite the outrageous gas prices. Hello Scopalomine; hopefully, good-bye to some car-sickness. I don't travel well. At all.

This year we are taking Vanessa with us; and I can't wait. She has never gone and she is so excited. We haven't been in two years; as last year I was just too icky to travel. This year shouldn't be too bad. I can't wait to go. No, I can't wait to BE there. I'm planning on sleeping on the way there. Frank is a dream, he drove the entire trip! I should probably drive some of it for him this year if I'm feeling better.

Oh, and better news; if the pain gets too unbearable, the infusion center is up and running. And I've utilized it. It's so much better than going to the hospital. So so so much better. Those days, I hope, are over. I can only hope. As for my meds, I'm just praying they'll continue to do their trick; because, there really is nothing left for me to try. As I truly have tried every round out there. Every. round. available, that is. for me. Outside of allergies and adverse reactions.

Enough of me. So, in honor of our faithful vetertans - like my grandpas and dad, Philip, etc - hang a flag, go to a parade. Which reminds me, our Marisa will be in a parade on Monday. her first parade. She is playing a snare drum. Watch for pictures.

Happy Memorial Day. One week for our Philip to be home with us. YEAH!!!!!!

Just for fun

Try this for fun: www.Joshhosler.biz/NumberOneInHistory/SelectMonth.htm

My song was The Ballad of the Green Berets by Staff Sgt Barry Sadler. How patriotic, considering Philip coming in today.

If you can't get enough of Mark Wood:

MARK WOOD CAMPS - SUMMER 2007!
So you've always wanted to work with Mark Wood up close and personal and learn some of his amazing violin methods? Well, here's your chance!
JULY 6-7: MARK WOOD CAMP - Chicago, IL. There's still some room to be a part of this amazing experience which is open to all string players from a variety of ages and skill levels! The weekend will culminate in a wonderful concert event!! Call 815-467-7698 for FULL details and pricing information.
JULY 16-21: International Fiddle School at Vanderbilt University - Nashville, TN
JULY 23-28: San Diego Mark O'Connor Strings Conference - San Diego, CACLICK HERE FOR MARK'S COMPLETE CALENDAR!

MARK TEACHES PHYSICS WITH DR. ALTMAN!
While in Oswego, NY where he spent a week working with students as part of our Electrify Your Strings program, Mark met physics professor Dr. Altman, who found his 7-string fretted Viper to be a PERFECT vehicle to demonstrate some incredible physics theories!CLICK HERE TO WATCH THE VIDEO!

ANOTHER SUCCESSFUL EYS TOUR ABOUT TO COME TO AN END!
By the next newsletter, we'll be continuing to update our Electrify Your Strings website with TONS of photos, stories, video clips, etc. from the 2006-2007 "Orchestra Rocks" tour that is just winding down... But for now, visit our "Experience" page (click on link below) to see (and hear) for yourself some of the amazing schools we've visited this year...Visit the EYS website!
Many thanks for being a part of the Mark Wood & Wood Violins community! Stay tuned for MORE EXCITING NEWS...Visit the official Mark Wood website for all the latest updates!

So, yes, I'm putting in my plug for Mark Wood. I believe he is doing something completely wonderful for educating our students. Learn about his cause. He sets kids on fire for music; something that is fast fading from many school districts. It came close to ours in my Freshman year.

I wish for you all, a wonderful weekend.

Guts, Gizzards and Gonads...Oh My!

Ah, the arrival of Spring. Tulips, Daffodils, Petunias, Dandelions. Yes, I do love the sunny, yellow Dandelions. A fistfull of them, when they come in from the front or backyard, is my absolute favorite.

I am not opposed to their smiling faces on my front lawn. Frank, on the other hand, is. The kids delight in them as they turn into, what we call, "blow flowers." They pick them, and make a wish, before they blow their little seeds across his lush green carpet of lawn. I'm just sure that Frank cringes each time he sees this.

With Spring also arrives the little bunnies. The baby bunnies; hopping along the flower beds, eating the clover, and the little buds of early springtime flowerheads. And along comes the Evil Kitty, Miss Nala; and the baby bunny is no more. No, the sweet little Thumper has not only been killed, but dismembered. Again.

This should not be a surprise to our family, but each year, at this time, it is. With the arrival of the first pelt of baby bunny, we all feel the same discontent toward her. We look at her with the same disregard.

Yesterday is when it happened. With the baby bunny, that is. Three days ago, maybe four, we saw the little field mice. One on the deck, one on the porch. Two weeks ago, there were the chipmunks. We've come to expect this from the cats. Not so much Bosco; he just plays with them, throws them in the air, just mice mostly. But Nala, she has the killer instinct down. Waay down - deep. Like Hanibal Lechter deep. Scary.

The kid's step-mom was quite terrified when she saw the chipmunk laying on the porch, dead, with his little teeth and paws - all dead-like. At first she was all sad, until I told her what happened. "Cat." To which, she just grimmaced, "OH! Nasty." I tried to explain the difference between the two cats, but she doesn't like cats. at all. So it didn't really matter. She was just mortified by whole deal I think. So Frank just bent over with a grocery bag and took care of the little thing. That may have grossed her out a bit, too.

Good thing she didn't see what Nala did yesterday! Overheard in my house: "Mom, Nala got a baby bunny!! Well, part of one, I think. Yep, it WAS a baby bunny!"

Then there was lots of yelling at the cat. They refused to let her in the house. She decided she wasn't going to come in anyway, she had to show me MY prize. Thankyouverymuch, Miss Naly. Off to the deck she scampers away. to dismember her bunny.

This morning, Marisa again refused to let her in the house. And as I looked out on the deck, I could see what remained of the bunny; some intestine, guts, and the other assorted insides and pelt. As if that wasn't gross enough, when Rocco went outside, he decided to dine on it. I hate. that. dog!

OK - speaking of dogs: Did anyone catch this stupidity this week??Implants for Neutered Dogs!! No kidding. They are called, get this, Neuticals - testicular implants for dogs that look and feel (cause I need to feel fido up) like the real thing - are said to boost a pet's self-esteem by replacing what was lost.

Made from polypropylene (at $119 a pair), solid silicone ($249)OR liquid-filled "ultra-plus" model ($889). Neuticles were intoduced in 1995 by Misouri inventor Glenn A Miller. He claims more than 230,000 pets in 49 countries have "Neuticled."

Are you KIDDING ME???? I can't wait to have Rockhead neutered! But that will be the day before I implant ANYTHING back into those hangers. I'd put a pic up of those rocks, but I'd probably lose my site.

On a better note - Philip will be coming home on American soil tomorrow!! Halleluia!! Thank you to all of those who prayed for his safety. Please continue to pray for our military, for our country. He will be home with us in 2 weeks. His Dad, Mom, Sis, Niece and even his Uncle from Italy are all meeting him in NC on Saturday. We are putting the finishing touches here on his room/family room right now.

A Chronic Blankey

If you suffer from chronic pain, or any chronic illness; and throw in a little wrench to your day - like say bronchitis; it makes things........interesting. If you add in oh, let's say um, the flu for instance, now we're talking vacation. A week, maybe two, if you're lucky - all to yourself - on the couch, then the bed, then the couch.

Of course, neither is comfortable, what with all of the body aches, the chills, did I mention the spinal pain?? I don't ever recall having pain running the length of my spine before like that. I didn't know I even had a spine really, but it's quite lengthy for someone of my stature (five feet) short. And the muscles that seem to unfold and wrap themselves around me; I felt everyone of them. For five straight days!

Now, for those of you who don't suffer with migraines; I know what you're thinking! "Duh, take Ibuprofen, dummy!" The thing is, I really can't. Well, I can't take too much due to something called rebound headache; which for me, is quite terrifying. And I've been there. However, after day three of absolutely NO relief from my heated cornbag, I caved. I took three - and they worked! It was like taking Morphine that one time in the hospital for my migraine. An instant of relief. Aahhhhhhhhhh!!!! But it came back. Naturally.

Guess who else came back! The storm. The dark and terrible storm of migraine has reared it's ugly head, and refuses to leave.

That is just par for being chronic. It comes on quick, it triggers the monster, and it's slow to leave. Whatever "IT" is.

I have been a mumbling fool the past 2 weeks. That is, when I can stay awake. I can't concentrate to make a sentace. I don't feel like I make sense. Simple things are seeming very difficult.

And it starts with that little itty blue pen dot of a lihgt. You're not sure if you see it at first, you know you do, deep down. But it's only there for a split second before it's gone. You wait to see it again, looking, searching, but you don't see it appear. Then you hear it, searing out of the distance, to the right. And it pierces the inside of your ear like the tine of a fork; sharp and jagged, cold. Louder and louder as it pierces. As it digs deeper, you feel the force of another object in the top of your head, like a railroad spike hammering in; 'BANG! BANG! BANG!' Topped off by the blow to the back of the skull that vibrates for the remainder of the day. No more light. No more sound. Your stomach is now reeling. The monster is back. You've been wrapped again in your chronic blankey. Migraine.

Well, Tickle MY Ivories

I totally love those socks! I must say, he was just fabulous, simply fabulous! What a charming man, that Harry.

He opened up with "Come by Me" and it was sooooo good! I was just moving and singing in my seat. What a blast. If you haven't seen Harry - GO. See. Harry!!!

His set design was very N'Orleans style, with street lamps and dark lighting, along with low- hanging ceiling fans; just three, which barely ran. I'm guessing the background picture was of the French Quarter, perhaps one of his favorite buildings.

His band, who were just as get-down-and-boogie in the Louisiana way as you can get, were all dressed in black suit and tie; as was Harry. He joked and complained about his high-heeled shoes, and co-miserated with us gals. What a down-home guy.

He played songs I've heard and a few I'd hadn't. But I so enjoyed him. Frank just enjoyed ME enjoying him. That's not to say he didn't enjoy the show.

When he sang the old Hank Williams, "Jambalaya," I jumped out of my seat!! My father used to sing that when I was a little girl, so naturally I had to sing along with Harry, too. It was so much fun. That was by far, the calmest crowd I've ever seen, I must say.

I would see him again if he comes back. Oh, and guess what is coming back? The Phantom! And Frank is working on our tickets. This time we will be taking the kids. And next year, Evita is coming!!! I wonder if they can get Antonio to play that part? Hmm..........

And the Mother-of-the-Year-Award Goes To..........(child whispering second edition)

Well, Me! No thanks to the 14 year old that currently resides under the roof. Please allow me to explain.

Let it first be stated, that on several occassions, too many actually, I have said this: "You will recieve ONE wake-up call and after that, you are on your own. The big, yellow vehicle which arrives at our door at 6:40, via our tax dollars will wait for 30 seconds. You get two trips from the red vehicle parked in the driveway; after that, you walk."

Today, was the "after that." At 5:40, Cinderfreakingrisa recieved her wake-up call. I didn't see her again until approximately 8:00 when Nick and I were eating breakfast.

Now, I must rewind to Friday. Friday was the banquet for Winter Drumline. As banquets go, this was an event for parents and the kids alike. Or. so. we. thought. On Thursday, while I was at the desk doing some uh work, I noticed the paperwork, minus the permission slip. I figured that Frank must have taken care of it. He also had noticed it, and thought the same. Thankfully, I asked him about it; and we both realized why it was missing - Marisa had taken it.

So I called her down to the office and asked her about it. Her explanation was this: " I didn't think you guys would want to go, so I just handed it in."

Naturally, the Mom in me is hurt; the growl in Frank is pissed. It's just the way we react. Now, there are still two other parents who have yet to be invited; her father and step-mother, and she has taken it upon herself to uninvite them as well. already. Naturally, she sees no wrong in her actions, as is her way.

My next statement is this, "I'm sure we can still go and just purchase our tickets at the door." Because, afterall, I do want to go. I am the supportive kind of parent. For the past two, maybe three years, I was unable to be a part of their concerts and events because of my illness. I was in and out of the hospital. Or recovering from being on the meds from being IN the hospital, and too sick to attend. So now that I am finally getting somewhat healthy, I want to be there!!

Her response to my statement was this: "NO, you can't! You can't just show up and buy tickets, Mom!" She clearly didn't want me there. It was more than obvious. And Frank let her have it. Thank you, Frank.

Now, this was on her father's weekend, which is Fri - Sun; and I drop the kids off at 5:30. I didn't know what time the banquet was, as she had taken the paperwork. She knew! As we were pulling up to her Dad's, pulling. up. to. her. Dad's, she says to me, "why don't you just drop me off?"

At that point, I would gladly drop her off, alone in a field nearby....... and make sure she arrived safely to her Dad's. But NO WAY IN THE WORLD was I taking her to the banquet and just dropping her off, as she suggested. The nerve of her even asking, well, she wasn't even asking really as much as suggesing.

Anyway, as I'm just starting my way up the road from her Dad's, he calls my cell, furious with ME! ME! Because I didn't drop her off! Are you kidding me?? Because the banquet starts in, get this, five minutes!! oh yeah.

So I try to fill him in with all of the details, but he is, rightly pissed, because he has dinner ready, on the table, and has company. I suggest he not take her. Hey, I wouldn't. But that's just me, because you know what, after what she pulled, it pretty much served her right. She didn't want any of us there in the first place. She has now put everyone in an uproar, which she care less about. He decides to take her. I definitely would have made her wait until I had eaten my hot dinner at least.

On Sunday, she comes home; not with an apology mind you. Oh no, not her. Those are rare if ever. She had a lousy attitude, which she blamed on her sister. I told her to leave it at her Father's house, because I didn't want it here. I say the same to Frank when he comes home from work with it. Don't bring it home, please.

She just sits and sulks and mopes with this rotten attitude, refuses to let it go. It just festers and gets worse as the night goes on. She brings it to dinner. Christina helped me to get dinner ready, set the table, clear the table; her attitude was bright and helpful. No snotty, brattiness. If she had been bratty at her Dad's, she left it there. I told Marisa to fill the d/w and we were going to bring Lexi home. So when she was done, she wanted to go walk with her friend, I said yes.

We get home, pick up Nick and Chrissy, go to Dunky D and get some goodies. Oh, did I mention we didn't get any for Marisa. Well, I didn't THINK SHE'D WANT ANY!!!!

Naturally, she didn't get that lesson.

So this am, when she woke up late, and I still hadn't recieved the proper apology, and I won't go into detail about the hand-written bickering I DID get, I informed her that she inded must walk to school today. To which she started to sulk.

Ahem, my award please....


Guess who just WON TICKETS TO SEE HARRY CONICK JR TONIGHT??? MMMMMMEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! I won. I can't wait. I can't believe I'm going to see Harry live! I need to go shower! I'm freaking out. What am I going to wear? I gootta go.

UPDATE:
It's 5:30, and I need to get ready to see Harry, but I have a migraine! Can you freaking stand it?! Go figure

Our Money Pit

Aahhh, home; the very idea of it makes one reflect on memories of sheer bliss. Happiness. Comfort. The smell of basil, garlic and meatballs; good sauce cooking on Sunday. Cherry-flavored pipe tobacco. Those are the smells I remember growing up around my Grandparents.


I remember the smell of Pine Sol; oh how I hate that smell. My mother would clean on Saturdays, like a maniac. No, more like the Tazmanian Devil. Pine Sol was her weapon of choice. It burned our eyes - she used it everywhere. She preferred we would get out of her way, way out of her way. "Go play in traffic!" She would lovingly yell at us as she'd show us to the door.


Two years ago, we lost our family room to a flood. I lost more than a family room, I lost sanity and tranquility. I lost orderly, cleanliness and lack of neatness.


I lost the ability to work, because of Migraine (not the flood), I am no longer able to multi-task, organize, and clean like I used to. My home has become almost as much of jumbled mess as my mind; almost. It's easier to to pick apart the house, room-by-room. I am learning to focus. But it is NOT easy. I still find myself trying to multi-task, and I get lost.


I did finish the bathroom, finally, and it is beautiful. The family room, that is mostly finished. It's painted, carpeted; the furniture is in place. I have the curtains purchased, but not hung. I missed my family room when we lost it two years ago in the flood. The kids have missed it, too. It's nice that they can retreat to it again. It will be even nicer that Philip will have a place to rest his head when he comes home. This is where he will find solace. This is the place he calls home.


On Saturday, we had a man come to measure an area for a privacy door for Philip, just at the bottom of the stairs. Nothing big, a folding door. While he was here, I asked him to look at the door leading to the back yard, which is in desperate need of replacement, which he did.



Now, just prior to his arrival, I had been up on the deck, which is quite large, about 16x30 FEET, and about 10 or so feet up above a concrete slab. Anyway, I noticed a few of the boards were oddly loose next to the house. Now the boards aren't really boards, as much as they are the composite material. Are you hearing, "Houston, we have a problem!"??



So I go wake up Frank. "Frank, we have a problem on the deck."



Ok, the guy just came in from working 3am to oh, what 9, and wanted a few hours, which I gave him - all of the hours he asked for. Probably not the way to wake him up; however, it did get his attention. Right! Now I'm seeing the potential for a major problem on the deck, but he's asking for another half hour of sleep. Are you kidding me???



See, here's the thing, I am an alarmist. And, the man of the house - er, the fixer of things. Things that need to be hung and put together-kind-of-thing. Or we call someone. Which is seriously, between the two of us, not a big deal. I'm ok with it, he's ok with it.


He is also better with the um, female things. Seriously. He can so totally hang out with my girlfriends, and "get it." And I totally don't care and think it's fun! As a matter of fact, when Menopause blows into town this summer - and I mean the musical, not the hormonal episode, I'm going with a gaggle of girls, he is serving wine and dessert at home. And he can't wait. Neither can I.



Back to Saturday. Apparently, the deck thing, bothered him. He woke up. The door man came soon after. Now, I was busy doing something so Frank brought the guy to the deck to show him the boards; and he immediately went down below saying, "this is NOT good, not good at all."


Nope, he wasn't kidding. What was supposed to be a simple installation of two doors; has turned into words like, "backhoe," and "collapse" and "danger" "insurance company" or "small construction equipment." I started to feel my knees begin to buckle, and I felt faint, as I mentally watched my children falling to their deaths as he told us how unsafe the deck was. I wanted to run and puke.



Apparently, all of this here snow on the deck

And this. Has caused our deck, which was improperly installed; to move away from the house by almost two inches in some areas. Some 10 feet up, mind you. Oh, and that's not all! Yeah, there's more, so much much more. Hence, the title. Oh, but please, let me take this little commercial break and take a pic of my pretty new bathroom makeover, because it is pretty, if I must say so MY freaking SELF. Thank you Judy for your painting. I can't paint anymore. But I did decorate.

The bathroom is sort of this color. Previously, it screamed this color! Yes, I like this better, too. Under the chocolate brown sheer is my very neatly organized closet. Hmmm, why didn't I get that? The room is taken up mostly by Nick's pool, I mean the jacuzzi.




It's too big to even get in the picture. It can fit like three people. At least two adults. And comfortably. It's too big for me to relax in, cause I'm too short, I just go under. My feet have nothing to touch to keep my head above the water. I've used brown and white for accents. So this is what you see when standing at the door.



The umm, office. It takes two shower curtains to decorate the pool/tub.



Now back to our regularly blogged blog: The Money Pit problem! And oh what a problem it is summing up to be. First he said not to allow anyone on the deck, because, "It could collapse at any time now!" That didn't sound good. That is where I was picturing blood and guts and brain matter splattering everwhere, from my children, onto the concrete below, that we were standing on. Under. the. deck. in. quesion. RIGHT of falling in collapse AT ANY TIME! Hey, bring it on. ok? OK!


Then he says, (you know it just gets better), I think you should call your insurance company, you have serious problems here. You're going to need to get a backhoe here to push this deck up to the house OR dismantle it completely. Hmmmmm, CHA-CHING!!! Let's see, now, back hoe, OR dismantle our wee little deck.


It was at that moment, the cartoon world took over in my backyard. Toontown became real, it was just something so unbelievably beautiful and scary at the same time. I looked at Frank, and seriously, at this point, after I heard the words "collapse" and "backhoe" there just wasn't much more I was hearing but something from the teacher in Peanut's comics. And suddenly Frank's eyes started to roll, like he was getting ill, you know? But they were turning green-like, $$$ these, and they just started to roll and roll in his head. And then steam started to blow out his ears. And funny, I was the only one who noticed it.


Anyway, the man decided to go get some lumber and make some trusses to stabilize the deck where it was pulling away. Thankfully, we were smart enough three years ago, to have someone do that in the middle of the deck; which is what saved us from having it completely collapse. We still need to have the concrete dug and the beams buried four feet, but this will keep us safe on the deck until we do. It's just fortunate we had someone who knew enough to look out for our safety; and we have the good Lord on our side. I am just thankful, so very thankful, that noone was hurt.


Apparently, whoever installed the deck, did so by nailing the main support beam, rather than bolting it into the house. Idiot. Unfortunately, we are finding a lot of the problems he had done on the house, and fixing them. Hopefully, we will find them before anyone gets hurt by them. What a cost they are to find. That's the price of home-ownership. I still love this grand house. Even if it is a money pit, it's our money pit.